Freethought & Rationalism Archive

David M. Payne · 01-28-2003, 11:46 PM

No, no Sonny Bob did it! Glad I could help you out here.

David

"God and religion, the oldest scam in history, and it still sucks them in today. So free your mind, and your body will follow!"

Harumi · 01-29-2003, 05:28 AM

All Things Dull and Ugly

All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.

Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid--
Who made the spikey urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

Amen.

Monty Python

I love Monty Python, don't you?

Dibble Helix · 01-29-2003, 05:47 AM

Quote:

I love Monty Python, don't you?

Yep

thebeave · 01-29-2003, 06:57 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sonny Burnett
I've always been one to enjoy the great outdoors. There's nothing as nice as a beautiful sunrise or sunset. A full moon with a sky full of stars is a wonder to the eye. How about the four seasons with everything springing to life in the spring after a long winters nap and then growing and blossoming through the summer. And what a beautiful sight the changing of the leaves is. I could go on and on, but you've seen it all for yourselves.

As a believer, I had always thanked God for putting these things here for our enjoyment, but you say that there is no God. Well ok then, if that's the case, do me one small favor.

Would you please tell me the name of the HUMAN responsible for putting all of the above mentioned wonders here for us to enjoy. I would like to give him my personal thanks and apologize for not giving him his just dues in the first place.

Please include his address, phone number, and e-mail address if possible.

I could try the phone book or directory assistance, but why bother when I have someone right here who seems to always have an answer for everything.

Thanks a bunch. I'll be waiting.

The human (excuse me, HUMAN) who created all this goes by the name of Jesus H. Christ (not sure what the "H" stands for). He's no ordinary human, though. He has a few embellishments, you might say. Like he can walk on water and turn water into wine. I understand he also can do the "saw a woman in half" trick, and bend spoons with his mind but since those miracles weren't written down by people who heard it from a friend who had heard it from a friend some 2000 years ago, we just don't have any concrete, solid proof (unlike the other two I mentioned). He's a great entertainer for birthday parties. And it could be that it was actually his dad that created this place, but some argue that Dad and Son are the same. Nobody really knows the true nature of the Father-Son relationship. As far as his address goes, last I heard it was somewhere in the Middle East, but you may want to avoid that place for the time being as the people who love Jesus are blowing up themselves and nearby innocent people into small pieces of flesh and bone to show who has the greater devotion to the creator Jesus. I also don't know if he has email or not. I suspect you might try him at jesushchrist@heaven.org. Give him a couple of days to get back to you, as he is quite busy these days making statues weep and branding his likeness into tacos and various other food products. Good Luck!

braces_for_impact · 01-29-2003, 07:09 AM

It was me, I don't accept adoration, but I do accept cash, most major credit cards, and money orders. NO personal checks.

Evil Milkman · 01-29-2003, 08:48 AM

Quote:

I've always been one to enjoy the great outdoors. There's nothing as nice as a beautiful sunrise or sunset. A full moon with a sky full of stars is a wonder to the eye. How about the four seasons with everything springing to life in the spring after a long winters nap and then growing and blossoming through the summer. And what a beautiful sight the changing of the leaves is. I could go on and on, but you've seen it all for yourselves.

As a believer, I had always thanked God for putting these things here for our enjoyment, but you say that there is no God. Well ok then, if that's the case, do me one small favor.

Would you please tell me the name of the HUMAN responsible for putting all of the above mentioned wonders here for us to enjoy. I would like to give him my personal thanks and apologize for not giving him his just dues in the first place.

Somebody's over inflated ego has really gotten in the way of rationalization. I'm amased everytime this "arugment" is vomited at me.

Ok, so I created everything. You don't have to thank me, though... You do realize you're going to hell, right Sonny?

ashibaka · 01-29-2003, 02:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sonny Burnett
Would you please tell me the name of the HUMAN responsible for putting all of the above mentioned wonders here for us to enjoy. I would like to give him my personal thanks and apologize for not giving him his just dues in the first place.

Please include his address, phone number, and e-mail address if possible.

Albert Arnold Gore, Jr.
32 5th Street
Palm Beach, FL 33480

(617) 859-7774
algore@attbi.com

Daisy · 01-29-2003, 03:50 PM

Yeah, Sonny's a troll.
Intro to Sonny from back in October

Denshuu's post brought a few atheists to faithform last year. Sonny was a big draw.

Amie · 01-30-2003, 09:04 AM

yeah real nice Denshu, real nice

BrotherMan · 01-30-2003, 09:11 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by ashibaka
Albert Arnold Gore, Jr.
32 5th Street
Palm Beach, FL 33480

(617) 859-7774
algore@attbi.com

:notworthy :notworthy :notworthy :notworthy :notworthy

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01-28-2003, 11:46 PM	#41
David M. Payne Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The land of chain smoking, bible thumping, holy ro Posts: 1,248	No, no Sonny Bob did it! Glad I could help you out here. David "God and religion, the oldest scam in history, and it still sucks them in today. So free your mind, and your body will follow!"

01-29-2003, 05:28 AM	#42
Harumi Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: N/A Posts: 3,184	All Things Dull and Ugly All things dull and ugly, All creatures short and squat, All things rude and nasty, The Lord God made the lot. Each little snake that poisons, Each little wasp that stings, He made their brutish venom. He made their horrid wings. All things sick and cancerous, All evil great and small, All things foul and dangerous, The Lord God made them all. Each nasty little hornet, Each beastly little squid-- Who made the spikey urchin? Who made the sharks? He did! All things scabbed and ulcerous, All pox both great and small, Putrid, foul and gangrenous, The Lord God made them all. Amen. Monty Python I love Monty Python, don't you?

01-29-2003, 07:09 AM	#45
braces_for_impact Veteran Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: In a nondescript, black helicopter. Posts: 6,637	It was me, I don't accept adoration, but I do accept cash, most major credit cards, and money orders. NO personal checks.

01-29-2003, 03:50 PM	#48
Daisy Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Halfway out the door... Posts: 788	Yeah, Sonny's a troll. Intro to Sonny from back in October Denshuu's post brought a few atheists to faithform last year. Sonny was a big draw.

01-30-2003, 09:04 AM	#49
Amie Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: New York Posts: 1,626	yeah real nice Denshu, real nice

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