Abacus

Eternity is a long time. Assuming that there really is a Heaven, what can one do to pass the time?

orac

You lie on the grass beside a river.

You sing a song. One song. Over and over. It has 4 lines, and nothing you could call a pleasant tune. It's less interesting than the song that never ends - only this one really does never end because you have to sing it until the end of eternity, and that's a very long time.

You like this. It makes you happy. This is how you want to spend eternity.

There is no escape. Suicide isn't an option.

(I'm not entirely sure the river is supposed to be literal, but there are people who believe in it. Still, after a few billion years of that song, your mind will be all mushy and it won't really matter, anyway.)

Any idea why this description of heaven never really appealed to me?

I should point out that I didn't make this up. There really are people who believe in the grass, river, and the song that even a child couldn't keep up for 5 minutes, no matter how painful it is for adults.)


My personal theory is that if heaven is real, then souls will have to be changed beyond recognition before human minds could survive billions of years of existance, yet alone eternity.

I don't think most people have the imagination to ponder eternal changelessness. People haven't got the lifespan required for sufficient perspective.

spurly

My idea of what we will do in heaven is the same thing we were supposed to do in the beginning. Love God, let him love us, revel in that relationship, and do whatever work he assigns us to do. However, the main thing is that it is all about having a relationship with God that lasts forever.

Kevin

trillian

I sincerely hope that if God takes me forever that he doesnt make me do his work. I wouldn't like to kill anyone, especially the babies, no matter how evil their parents were. Perhaps he'll let me design new solar systems and a nebula or 5 million.

I might just rather go to hell for the BBQ.

Bane

Oh great. God sounds like a foreman. Why would a god require us to do work for him\her\it?

So far I'm more impressed with hell.

philechat

An eternity being God's slave? Otherwise we will be roasted in Hell?

Ah...who cares. We've got better company down under. Certainly more diverse, more artistic, and less cow-like than those above.

orac

If you go to heaven, God will give you work to do?

Ah well, at least he'll give us one day off a week. That's much better than the two days a week off work I'm forced to endure now.

Cutter

Could spurly, or any other theist who believes the incredible bullshit spurly just spouted, answer me this one simple question:

What in the fucking hell does an omnipotent being need servants/workers for?

Are we not talking about god here? Are we not talking about a being that can supposedly do anything? Are we not talking about a being that supposedly said "Let there be light" and, poof!, insta-universe?

Why the fuck would god want someone to scrub his toilet for him, when he can do it with a passing thought?

trillian

Hail Cutter :notworthy for cutting throught the bullshit "niceties" to a very valid point.

:notworthy

emotional

Rivers of wine and milk. Cool fountains. Endless fruits of endless trees. And best of all:

ALL THOSE PRETTY VIRGINS!!!

What more could you ask for? ALLAH IS GRAPE!