BreezySheezy

Check it.....

My mother is a very strong believer in God and his power to bring you out of various situations. We argue all the time because I'm really not into the whole religion thing right now. I used to love to go to church and worship God with friends and family until my Granny died.

I went into a deep depression for some time and I just remember people telling me that "God loves me and this all is in his master plan." Well, if God loved me, why would he hurt me so bad? That curiosity turned into confusion, that into anger, and that into hate. I don't attend church anymore and it makes me sick to my stomach when people say," God bless you!" or even talk about God in my presence.

My mother says that I have serious issues. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Do I really have serious issues?

Darkblade

I'm not a moderator, but it seems that this thread would be better placed in Secular Lifestyle & Support.

Viti

Many believers become angry with God for a variety of reasons...certainly the atheists here will not put a moral value on your anger at something we do not believe exists. Basically we can't say it's right or wrong...it's just the way you feel.

That being said, if you believe in God, but are very angry at him/her/it, it could cause you problems (carrying around anger and hate is not healthy)...you may want to explore your anger with a clergy member or therapist and try to find some peace.

Do you feel your anger is leading you to disbelieve in the existence of god(s)? It doesn't sound like it, but just wanted to verify...it would be easier to give you my opinion you if I knew the crux of the situation.

Jamie_L

Anger is a natural part of the grieving process. I've always thought this anger would be tougher for believers to deal with, because they have God to be angry at. When I suffered my most tragic loss, though I was angry, I didn't have to fit that anger in with the whold "divine plan" or whatever. There were no rationalizations required. It just sucked, end of story.

With God in the picture, it gets more complicated. So, I imagine your anger is quite understandable, if not commonplace.

It sounds like you do need to think seriously about what you believe. Obviously, many people are able to reconcile anger over loss with their religious beliefs. Others get turned to another path. Either way, anger is going to be there. As long as it doesn't lead to obsessive behavior or serious depression, I wouldn't think it is anything to worry about.

Of course, I'm just an atheist on the internet. So take my thoughts with plenty of salt.

Jamie

DBrant

When you say "anger" and "hate," who is that directed towards? Are you angry at God? Because if you reread the OT, the fact that God allows (or causes) pain and suffering is really no secret. If you're willing to accept the default Christian defense mechanism "god works in mysterious ways," then you have nothing to be angry at. However, if you're no longer willing to accept it, then you've got a pretty big matza-ball, and it might be time to rethink your entire belief structure.

Here are some more defense mechanisms to pick from:
"God exists outside of 'creation' and doesn't have to follow its rules."
"Humans can't understand God's idea of love."
"Granny didn't die -- God took her."

Or are you angry at your parents? After all, it was they who introduced your impressionable young mind to the Christian god. But then, again, you really have nothing to be angry at, because your parents were only doing what their parents taught them to do, and their parents before them. Sooner or later, there has to be a child who will actually question and challenge the ancestral beliefs, and you appear to be it.

The thing to remember is to reexamine your beliefs with a clear, optimistic, and peaceful mind. Anger and hate has never helped anyone.

Jayhawker Soule

BreezySheezy, first of all, I'm very sorry for your loss. Your Granny was clearly important to you. It sounds like she was rather special.

I believe that LadyShea has given sound advice, all the more so if the death was recent. If you do, in fact, have an anger issue, I suggest that yo deal with that first. There will be more than enough time afterwards to address issues of theology.

Take care.

Philosoft

I concur that this should go to SL&S...

Tyler A DiPietro

I can defintiely sympathize, I went through the same thing. My grandfathers death was the one event in my life that eventually lead me to become an atheist. I won't go into the details of his death, but it wasn't pleasent. There's nothing wrong with thinking the way you do. You don't have "serious issues", you've just been awakened to reality. Eventually you'll just get over it and enjoy life again.

-Tyler-

Family Man

Yes, I think you have issues. Atheism is not about anger at God; it is about the non-existence of God. While how you feel is a normal part of the grieving process, it is not a valid reason for not believing in God.

I suggest that you work your way through your grief first (and counseling may be desirable here) then decide what your religious beliefs are.

CX

Sounds to me like the initial stages of deconversion. For many nonbelievers who grew up as believers the first stages of the transition to nonbelief are somewhat painful. I liken it very much to discovering Santa Klaus isn't real. All your life the world seems one way and things seem certain and then suddenly...WHAM...the rug gets pulled out from under you. In any event whether you're on the path to nonbelief or not, your feelings are not wrong. Feelings never are. Only how you choose to act on those feelings can be right or wrong. Furthermore, feelings are always impermanent. How you feel now is not precisely how you will feel later. Hang in there.