Proxima Centauri

Being a Roman Catholic must be terrible.
Every time you masticate you have to go afterwards and confess to a Priest. No, I didn't mean masticate, I think you can guess what I meant. Well you can't even wank without going to confession afterwards. Then, if you are unlucky, the Priest will want to know all the juicy details. Exactly where did you put your hand? That place? Really? How many times did you put your hand there? How much sinful enjoyment did you derive from all of that?
If you go with a partner it will be as bad or worse.
PRIEST. Well my daughter, so you went with a young man. Where did he touch you? You let him touch you there? And in other places as well, which places? And did you touch him anywhere? And did you and he do anything else as well? Oh dear this was really sinful. How many times did you do all that, my daughter?
And if you are a man it will be roughly the same, except that the Priest will call you his son. Now not all Priests are totally celebate but they can't possibly be father to the whole of their congregation, can they? Is that logical?
And think how sad it is for the Priest. He's not supposed to wank either, or date a woman, or marry (Or date a man even if he's tempted that way). And he's not really supposed to get excited when he hears confession. But he's a man can he help himself?
And what about those Priests who don't stay celebate? They just get moved from parish to parish every time they get found out. I'm sure the other discussion threads are dealing with that one.

[ April 30, 2002: Message edited by: B.Shack ]</p>

Eudaimonist

Are you a former Roman Catholic? Based on my personal experiences as a Roman Catholic in New York State when I was younger, what you describe isn't typical. Probably only a few priests act like the comedic fodder you describe, and I doubt many Catholics bother to confess acts of masturbation.

Being a Catholic wasn't terrible; it simply involved lots of unjustified beliefs. The worst I can say about being a Catholic is that Masses tend to be boring.

Proxima Centauri

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Sorry you didn't like it. Still I'm sure loads of Internet Infidels will really enjoy laughing at the comedic fodder I describe.

daemon

The aroma of the blasted sandlewood incense always made my throat swell up, too. Always felt like I was choking.

Bree

Moving to Humour, Et Cetera...

[ April 30, 2002: Message edited by: Bree ]</p>