Chiron

[doh! Double post, with a gap of 7 hours...]

Jennie

Bree,

If the man wanted children more than he loved you, then you'd want him to leave, would you not? (If you weren't lesbian of course.)

Whether or not it is moral seems a moot point to me. We had trouble having children and there was never any question of either of us leaving the other; however, infertility when children are wanted is extremely stressful, and many couples do break up because the stress is too great or because one or the other experience depression and it isn't treated properly. It is a complex issue and I think needs to be resolved couple by couple rather than by sweeping statements.

If the infertility is known from the start, and the potential partner wants children then I don't think there is anything particularly immoral in not starting a relationship due to that reason. There's also nothing immoral in deciding not to start a relationship for most any other reason, even trivial ones like you don't like someone's eyebrows. I don't think male or female makes much difference here. Or even lesbian, as lesbians can have children too; albeit they are unlikely to be accidental.

Dr Rick

Here is a good reason not to marry for procreative purposes.

The link has a big file; you'll probably need a high-speed connection to enjoy it.