Freethought & Rationalism Archive

worldling · 07-10-2003, 08:19 AM

Theoretically speaking, of course.

Given that millions of people claim to have a personal relationship with another, equally famous, dead person - and genuinely believe that they do - do you think that, under the right conditions, it would be possible for someone to develop an equally "real" personal relationship with Elvis?

Spaz · 07-10-2003, 08:40 AM

What? Elvis isn't dead!

I found this lovely site: http://www.geocities.com/nashville/o...17/elvis2.html

"Elvis - Jesus Similarities:

Jesus said: "Love thy neighbor." (Matthew 22:39)
Elvis said: "Don't be cruel." (RCA, 1956)
Jesus is the Lord's shepherd.
Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd.
Jesus was part of the Trinity.
Elvis' first band was a trio.
Jesus walked on water. (Matthew 14:25)
Elvis surfed. (Blue Hawaii, Paramount, 1965)
Jesus' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members.
Elvis' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members.
Jesus was resurrected.
Elvis had the famous 1968 "comeback" TV special.
Jesus said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink." (John 7:37)
Elvis said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM, 1957)
Jesus fasted for 40 days and nights.
Elvis had irregular eating habits. (e.g. 5 banana splits for breakfast)
Jesus is a Capricorn. (December 25)
Elvis is a Capricorn. (January 8)
Matthew was one of Jesus' many biographers. (The Gospel According to Matthew)
Neil Matthews was one of Elvis' many biographers. (Elvis: A Golden Tribute)
"[Jesus] countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow."
(Matthew 28:3)
Elvis wore snow-white jumpsuits with lightning bolts.
Jesus lived in state of grace in a Near Eastern land.
Elvis lived in Graceland in a nearly eastern state.
Mary, an important woman in Jesus' life, had an Immaculate Conception.
Priscilla, an important woman in Elvis' life, went to Immaculate Conception High School.
Jesus was first and foremost the Son of God.
Elvis first recorded with Sun Studios, which today are still considered to be his foremost recordings.
Jesus was the lamb of God.
Elvis had mutton chop sideburns.
Jesus' Father is everywhere.
Elvis' father was a drifter, and moved around quite a bit.
Jesus was a carpenter.
Elvis' favorite high school class was wood shop.
Jesus wore a crown of thorns.
Elvis wore Royal Crown hair styler.
Jesus H. Christ has 12 letters.
Elvis Presley has 12 letters.
No one knows what the "H" in "Jesus H. Christ" stood for.
No one was really sure if Elvis' middle name was "Aron" or "Aaron".
Jesus is often depicted in pictures with a halo that looks like a gold plate.
Elvis' face is often depicted on a plate with gold trim and sold through TV.
Jesus said: "Man shall not live by bread alone."
Elvis liked his sandwiches with peanut butter and bananas."

emotional · 07-10-2003, 08:46 AM

http://www.uncoveror.com/elvites.htm

Elvis is Lord and Saviour! Elvis is alive! He died, and rose from the dead! He who believeth on Elvis hath eternal life! He is the Redeemer, the Coming King! Glory!

Arken · 07-10-2003, 08:52 AM

Here's the website of the First Presleyterian Church of Elvis the Divine: http://www.geocities.com/presleyterian_church/

And the 1980s hit from Alannah Myles, Black Velvet, was about Elvis worship. Don't believe me? Check out the lyrics:

Quote:

Black Velvet
Alannah Myles

Mississippi in the middle of a dry spell
Jimmy Rogers on the Victrola up high
Mama's dancin' with baby on her shoulder
The sun is settin' like molasses in the sky
The boy could sing, knew how to move, everything
Always wanting more, he'd leave you longing for

CHORUS
Black velvet and that little boy's smile
Black velvet with that slow southern style
A new religion that'll bring ya to your knees
Black velvet if you please

Up in Memphis the music's like a heatwave
White lightening, bound to drive you wild
Mama's baby's in the heart of every school girl
"Love me tender" leaves 'em cryin' in the aisle
The way he moved, it was a sin, so sweet and true
Always wanting more, he'd leave you longing for

CHORUS

Every word of every song that he sang was for you
In a flash he was gone, it happened so soon, what could you do?

(Solo)

CHORUS 2x

If you please, if you please, if you please

Abacus · 07-10-2003, 09:01 AM

Of course you can ... if you're delusional enough.

JGL53 · 07-10-2003, 09:16 AM

Jesus was born amongst barnyard animals in a manger in the shithole town of Bethlehem.

Elvis was born amongst rednecks in a shotgun shack in the shithole town of Tupelo.

The coincidences continue to pile up.

07-10-2003, 08:19 AM	#1
worldling Regular Member Join Date: May 2002 Location: UK Posts: 156	Can you have a personal relationship with Elvis? Theoretically speaking, of course. Given that millions of people claim to have a personal relationship with another, equally famous, dead person - and genuinely believe that they do - do you think that, under the right conditions, it would be possible for someone to develop an equally "real" personal relationship with Elvis?

07-10-2003, 09:01 AM	#5
Abacus Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: South Dakota Posts: 2,214	Re: Can you have a personal relationship with Elvis? Of course you can ... if you're delusional enough.

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07-10-2003, 08:40 AM	#2
Spaz Veteran Member Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: 6th Circle of Hell Posts: 1,093	What? Elvis isn't dead! I found this lovely site: http://www.geocities.com/nashville/o...17/elvis2.html "Elvis - Jesus Similarities: Jesus said: "Love thy neighbor." (Matthew 22:39) Elvis said: "Don't be cruel." (RCA, 1956) Jesus is the Lord's shepherd. Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd. Jesus was part of the Trinity. Elvis' first band was a trio. Jesus walked on water. (Matthew 14:25) Elvis surfed. (Blue Hawaii, Paramount, 1965) Jesus' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members. Elvis' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members. Jesus was resurrected. Elvis had the famous 1968 "comeback" TV special. Jesus said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink." (John 7:37) Elvis said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM, 1957) Jesus fasted for 40 days and nights. Elvis had irregular eating habits. (e.g. 5 banana splits for breakfast) Jesus is a Capricorn. (December 25) Elvis is a Capricorn. (January 8) Matthew was one of Jesus' many biographers. (The Gospel According to Matthew) Neil Matthews was one of Elvis' many biographers. (Elvis: A Golden Tribute) "[Jesus] countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow." (Matthew 28:3) Elvis wore snow-white jumpsuits with lightning bolts. Jesus lived in state of grace in a Near Eastern land. Elvis lived in Graceland in a nearly eastern state. Mary, an important woman in Jesus' life, had an Immaculate Conception. Priscilla, an important woman in Elvis' life, went to Immaculate Conception High School. Jesus was first and foremost the Son of God. Elvis first recorded with Sun Studios, which today are still considered to be his foremost recordings. Jesus was the lamb of God. Elvis had mutton chop sideburns. Jesus' Father is everywhere. Elvis' father was a drifter, and moved around quite a bit. Jesus was a carpenter. Elvis' favorite high school class was wood shop. Jesus wore a crown of thorns. Elvis wore Royal Crown hair styler. Jesus H. Christ has 12 letters. Elvis Presley has 12 letters. No one knows what the "H" in "Jesus H. Christ" stood for. No one was really sure if Elvis' middle name was "Aron" or "Aaron". Jesus is often depicted in pictures with a halo that looks like a gold plate. Elvis' face is often depicted on a plate with gold trim and sold through TV. Jesus said: "Man shall not live by bread alone." Elvis liked his sandwiches with peanut butter and bananas."

07-10-2003, 08:46 AM	#3
emotional Banned Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Boxing ring of HaShem, Jesus and Allah Posts: 1,945	http://www.uncoveror.com/elvites.htm Elvis is Lord and Saviour! Elvis is alive! He died, and rose from the dead! He who believeth on Elvis hath eternal life! He is the Redeemer, the Coming King! Glory!

07-10-2003, 09:16 AM	#6
JGL53 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Outer Mongolia Posts: 4,091	Jesus was born amongst barnyard animals in a manger in the shithole town of Bethlehem. Elvis was born amongst rednecks in a shotgun shack in the shithole town of Tupelo. The coincidences continue to pile up.

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