Freethought & Rationalism Archive

sullster · 06-13-2003, 03:57 PM

A couple of the threads in this section have made me ask the question: Do boys and men fear women? If so, what are the causes?

My own answers would include the difficulty, especially with very young men, of getting beyond the effects of female sensuality. Female sensuality can be so intoxicating that it interferes with the admittedly limited verbal abilities of young males. This can lead to a type of fear. It is not the fault of girls and women that their sensuality is so intoxicating to males, mind you.

I realise that women fear men, but the fear is more of the physical violence that men could do to them, it doesn't seem to be of a similar nature to that of male fear.

There is more to this.

mecca777 · 06-13-2003, 04:06 PM

'Cause, y'know. It's. *pause* Girls.

*runs away, hides face*
----
In reality, I have no idea why some men seem to be so petrified of women. I've always had more female friends than male friends, so it's never been a problem for me to talk to the opposite sex, although sometimes specific areas of conversation can feel a bit awkward.

However, I feel I should contribute a scattergun generalisation based on disputed sources to the discussion, so I'm going with Oedipus complexes. Lots and lots of Oedipi.

RevDahlia · 06-13-2003, 04:16 PM

I think that women's sexuality has traditionally been portrayed as an intrinsically scary thing. Also, most people, not just men, have a fear of the unknown. Women are supposed to be all mysterious and inexplicable. (Whether or not we actually are, any more so than men are, is debatable.)

I've also noticed that some men seem to resent women a good deal. This may be a product of fear, and the fact that women have a good measure of control over men simply by virtue of that y'all want to bone down with us. Nobody likes being deprived of control.

That said... although I have known quite a few gynophobes, I think more men are mystified about women than frightened of them. It all depends on how healthy one's ego is, imo.

Corona688 · 06-13-2003, 05:16 PM

Well, it's often said; 'men propose, women dismiss'. It's quite commonly felt by men that we're the ones that we're the ones that're supposed to parade around and try and catch someone's attention, while the women watch on and judge us.. that's a great deal of pressure.

Stiletto One · 06-13-2003, 07:00 PM

At 17, I have to say I've pretty much gotten past the whole "girls are scary" thing.

HOWEVER:

I'm not a flirtatious guy at all, and (in consequence?) I tend to be disregarded when girls are out "hunting" for boys (something like that...you know what I mean). I'm apparently just not considered a candidate for a boyfriend. :banghead: On the other hand, I don't mind that much, because I'm not that attracted to most girls anyway�I can actually say that I'm not a very superficial guy, and considering how a lot of girls in my age group are...yeah.

PFFT to that!

tronvillain · 06-13-2003, 08:58 PM

Well, I think some men fear women, but most of us get over it pretty young. It is not that "female sensuality can be so intoxicating that it interferes with the admittedly limited verbal abilities of young males", it is that when one first begins to approach women one is intensely emotionally vulnerable and rejection or humiliation can be extremely painful.

sullster · 06-14-2003, 03:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tronvillain
Well, I think some men fear women, but most of us get over it pretty young. It is not that "female sensuality can be so intoxicating that it interferes with the admittedly limited verbal abilities of young males", it is that when one first begins to approach women one is intensely emotionally vulnerable and rejection or humiliation can be extremely painful.

What you say makes a lot of sense about how males feel vulnerable and feel deep pain after rejection by a female.

It truly is a myth that males are the "stronger" sex. Some males are totally ruined after a few encounters with females. Sounds like a "weakness" to me.

Perhaps it is not females that are feared per se, but the intense emotions and anxieties that can be had after being rejected or humiliated. Males are considered insensitive, yet this seems like hypersensitivity to me.

tronvillain · 06-14-2003, 03:56 PM

Yes, perhaps males can be more sensitive in some ways, but perhaps it also leads us to overcompensate in the other direction.

pz · 06-14-2003, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sullster
A couple of the threads in this section have made me ask the question: Do boys and men fear women? If so, what are the causes?

Jeez, what planet have you been on? I learned the answer to that in first grade.

Cooties.

Gnomelord · 06-14-2003, 04:49 PM

I have the exact opposite problem.

My girlfriend is too sexual. And I am too sensual. I enjoy a good long conversation in which I may delve the depths of anothers mind. Whereas she openly refuses to talk.

And of course, this all being at the grand old age of 16.

06-13-2003, 03:57 PM	#1
sullster Veteran Member Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: North of Boston Posts: 1,392	Fear of Women A couple of the threads in this section have made me ask the question: Do boys and men fear women? If so, what are the causes? My own answers would include the difficulty, especially with very young men, of getting beyond the effects of female sensuality. Female sensuality can be so intoxicating that it interferes with the admittedly limited verbal abilities of young males. This can lead to a type of fear. It is not the fault of girls and women that their sensuality is so intoxicating to males, mind you. I realise that women fear men, but the fear is more of the physical violence that men could do to them, it doesn't seem to be of a similar nature to that of male fear. There is more to this.

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06-13-2003, 04:06 PM	#2
mecca777 Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Newcastle-upon-Tyne, UK Posts: 1,255	'Cause, y'know. It's. pause Girls. runs away, hides face ---- In reality, I have no idea why some men seem to be so petrified of women. I've always had more female friends than male friends, so it's never been a problem for me to talk to the opposite sex, although sometimes specific areas of conversation can feel a bit awkward. However, I feel I should contribute a scattergun generalisation based on disputed sources to the discussion, so I'm going with Oedipus complexes. Lots and lots of Oedipi.

06-13-2003, 04:16 PM	#3
RevDahlia Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Austin, TX, USA Posts: 4,930	I think that women's sexuality has traditionally been portrayed as an intrinsically scary thing. Also, most people, not just men, have a fear of the unknown. Women are supposed to be all mysterious and inexplicable. (Whether or not we actually are, any more so than men are, is debatable.) I've also noticed that some men seem to resent women a good deal. This may be a product of fear, and the fact that women have a good measure of control over men simply by virtue of that y'all want to bone down with us. Nobody likes being deprived of control. That said... although I have known quite a few gynophobes, I think more men are mystified about women than frightened of them. It all depends on how healthy one's ego is, imo.

06-13-2003, 05:16 PM	#4
Corona688 Veteran Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Hiding from Julian ;) Posts: 5,368	Well, it's often said; 'men propose, women dismiss'. It's quite commonly felt by men that we're the ones that we're the ones that're supposed to parade around and try and catch someone's attention, while the women watch on and judge us.. that's a great deal of pressure.

06-13-2003, 07:00 PM	#5
Stiletto One Beloved Deceased Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 7,150	At 17, I have to say I've pretty much gotten past the whole "girls are scary" thing. HOWEVER: I'm not a flirtatious guy at all, and (in consequence?) I tend to be disregarded when girls are out "hunting" for boys (something like that...you know what I mean). I'm apparently just not considered a candidate for a boyfriend. :banghead: On the other hand, I don't mind that much, because I'm not that attracted to most girls anyway�I can actually say that I'm not a very superficial guy, and considering how a lot of girls in my age group are...yeah. PFFT to that!

06-13-2003, 08:58 PM	#6
tronvillain Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Alberta, Canada Posts: 5,658	Well, I think some men fear women, but most of us get over it pretty young. It is not that "female sensuality can be so intoxicating that it interferes with the admittedly limited verbal abilities of young males", it is that when one first begins to approach women one is intensely emotionally vulnerable and rejection or humiliation can be extremely painful.

06-14-2003, 03:56 PM	#8
tronvillain Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Alberta, Canada Posts: 5,658	Yes, perhaps males can be more sensitive in some ways, but perhaps it also leads us to overcompensate in the other direction.

06-14-2003, 04:49 PM	#10
Gnomelord Regular Member Join Date: May 2003 Location: Madison, WI Posts: 127	I have the exact opposite problem. My girlfriend is too sexual. And I am too sensual. I enjoy a good long conversation in which I may delve the depths of anothers mind. Whereas she openly refuses to talk. And of course, this all being at the grand old age of 16.

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