S.A.TAN

Hello Kind Bud!

If I can do the hokey pokey as wellas God can, does that get me to heaven?

Cos we dudes in hell been trying to do the hokey pokey for years and we still can't get it right, dats why God doesn't want us to get back in to heaven

mattmattmattmattv

"Can [God] do the Hokey-Pokey?"

Nice! Funny and deep at the same time.

'I find it unfathomable how anyone could have a "personal relationship" with anyone who couldn't do the Hokey-Pokey, or who wouldn't wish they could if they weren't able."

Far lower on the scale of fathomability is this: How can anyone call a relationship "personal" which is entirely one way? Imagine that you lived far from your friend. You write letters, but never get a single reply in your whole life. In fact, all you get is that you occasionally hear from a man, claiming to have been sent by your friend, who tells you that your friend loves you very much, and doesn't want you to burn eternally (as he does want at least 2/3 of the people on earth to do). What a relationship, eh?

matt

rainbow walking

rw: WTF?! So that's what the church has been doing for all these thousands of years, huh? The hokey-pokey? In and out and in and out...sounds like the religious experience to me

[b]since Heavenly Father has a physical body (exalted of course, but since He has a body, he could do the Hokey-Pokey with it).[/b[

rw: Uh...just curious, but I was wondering if you could maybe give us a brief description of this exalted body and where, in this physical universe, it's being kept? Seems to me if god could do this he'd rather enjoy doing it with folks who enjoy it as much as he does, so has anybody ever had the epiphanic experience of doing the HP with god? The last waltz or even the funky chicken?

Can other believers say the same thing about God as they understand Him?


rw: Don't you mean "Would other believers say the same thing if this were true?"

Can He do the Hokey-Pokey? I don't mean can He materialze a body-shaped apparition that appears to do the Hokey-Pokey, I mean can God Himself do the Hokey-Pokey, and all that the Hokey-Pokey entails (right foot in, etc.)?

rw: If such a god existed and actually could I would say he would be guilty of a deriliction of duties were he to initiate a dance club before resolving some of the more pressing issues such as evil and suffering. After all, who feels like doing the HP after being victimized?

If He can't do the Hokey-Pokey - I mean, without a body, it'd be kinda hard, I imagine - would He wish he could? Is it even possible for Him to wish he could do the Hokey-Pokey?

rw: So, was the HP the brainchild of the church?

I'm asking because I find it unfathomable how anyone could have a "personal relationship" with anyone who couldn't do the Hokey-Pokey, or who wouldn't wish they could if they weren't able.

rw: Define "personal relationship".

HelenM

Well, some believe Him to be the <a href="http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/l/o/r/lordoftd.htm" target="_blank">Lord of the Dance</a>...

WJ

Hi Helen!

God can not only do the hokey, but can do a polka all at the same time and in the same respect!!

I think it goes back to his big tools...

HelenM

Are you jealous, WJ? Do you have an obsession with 'big tools'?

love
Helen

rainbow walking

rw: Now you see children, that's why we cannot allow dancing in church. It ultimately and always leads to these...uh...er...other things less holy. WJ! Get your hand back on her shoulder! That isn't where you were taught to place your hands, young man!

WJ

Yes I know....and when I dance, it gets in the way.

Helen! Isn't it strange that folks worry about size...I mean shoes that is.

Autonemesis

In Mormon theology, the Celestial Kingdom is located on the planet Kolob, where heavenly Father resides with the Hosts of Heaven. Where Kolob is located is another question entirely, but Mormons believe it is a material planet within the physical cosmos.

Indeed. When it comes to non-Mormon ideas of the Christian God, what is a "personal relationship"? At least the Mormon idea of God is approachable, I mean if you met Him, you could shake his hand, and He could knowingly wink back at you (since He actually has a physical hand and eye to physically shake and wink). A personal relationship with an exalted being possessing an exalted human body is at least conceivable, under the ordinary meanings of the words "personal" and "relationship".

Jobar

"Tools"?! Multiple?! Hey, I thought that Man was supposed to be created in God's image! Are you trying to say he kept 'something extra' for himself, and gave man only one???