Freethought & Rationalism Archive

brighid · 05-09-2003, 07:59 AM

Quote:

She used to be a very happy soul, now she is angry and sad. She often complains that she was "lied to". Marriage was supposed to be 'glorious' and 'wonderful'. She tried to blame the media, and then blamed the secular people and on and on. She is searching for answers why her 'fantasy dream marriage' did not come true....

Maybe should start looking within for those answers because it seems that the responsibility for her illusions about marriage should fall squarely in her lap. Unfortunately many people refuse to take responsibility for the condition of their life (the areas they DO have control over) and instead blame everyone else for their lack of happiness, fulfillment, peace, etc.

I don't know if these will come in handy, but here are a few of my favorite quotes on this subject:

Quote:

Every man is the architect of his own life. He builds it just the way he wants it. However, after he has built what he wants, he sometimes decides that he doesn't like what he has built and looks for someone or something to blame instead of changing himself.

Sidney Madwed

Quote:

A man may fall many times but he won't be a failure until he says someone pushed him.

- Elmer G Letterman

Quote:

Never feel self-pity, the most destructive emotion there is. How awful to be caught up in the terrible squirrel cage of self.

Millicent Fenwick

Brighid

PalestineChic19 · 05-09-2003, 11:54 AM

no offense, but are my jokes THAT bad and hard to get? lol. guess I'm not funny.I pledge to stop trying to be....

-Samirah

Debbie T · 05-09-2003, 12:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by PalestineChic19
no offense, but are my jokes THAT bad and hard to get? lol. guess I'm not funny.I pledge to stop trying to be....

-Samirah

I got it right away, and yes it was funny.

HelenM · 05-09-2003, 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by tdekeyser
What is the Xian rules for divorce? I was told something about a covenet (sp?) or something....

She can never get divorced she says because of this.....

Because of what? Is there some sin or something I have not heard of yet?

Conservative Christians do teach that marriage is for life and divorce is a sin.

It's considered a sin because it's breaking those 'until death do us part' promises.

Helen

Viti · 05-09-2003, 07:28 PM

Jesus spoke against divorce, in Matthew IIRC

Found it

Matthew
Chapter 19

19:3 Pharisees came to him, testing him, and saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?"

19:4 He answered, "Haven't you read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female,

19:5 and said, 'For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall join to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh?'

19:6 So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, don't let man tear apart."

19:7 They asked him, "Why then did Moses command us to give her a bill of divorce, and divorce her?"

19:8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it has not been so.

19:9 I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and he who marries her when she is divorced commits adultery."

sakrilege · 05-10-2003, 05:29 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by LadyShea
19:9 I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and he who marries her when she is divorced commits adultery."

Seems that it's not divorce itself that is the sin but remarriage. But if the spouse dies and a person remarries, how is that different?

Dargo · 05-10-2003, 05:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by HelenM
Conservative Christians do teach that marriage is for life and divorce is a sin.

It's considered a sin because it's breaking those 'until death do us part' promises.

I remember hearing a few sermons about how divorce was wrong back when I was a fundie. There were still plenty of divorced people in the churches I went to, so I guess they don't worry much about this "sin".

AdamWho · 05-10-2003, 11:53 AM

If the husband were a true Christian he would read up on 1 Timothy 2:12
But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

Dargo · 05-10-2003, 12:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by AdamWho
If the husband were a true Christian he would read up on 1 Timothy 2:12
But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

That's another verse that fundies seem to ignore when it's convenient.

HelenM · 05-10-2003, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sakrilege
Seems that it's not divorce itself that is the sin but remarriage. But if the spouse dies and a person remarries, how is that different?

I think it's divorce also, although in practice I expect most people who got divorced did so because they wanted to marry someone else. Here's another passage about it:

Malachi 2:13 Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. 14 You ask, "Why?" It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. 15 Has not [the LORD] made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. 16 "I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty.

Helen

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05-09-2003, 11:54 AM	#12
PalestineChic19 Regular Member Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 153	no offense, but are my jokes THAT bad and hard to get? lol. guess I'm not funny.I pledge to stop trying to be.... -Samirah

05-09-2003, 07:28 PM	#15
Viti Contributor Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Down South Posts: 12,879	Jesus spoke against divorce, in Matthew IIRC Found it Matthew Chapter 19 19:3 Pharisees came to him, testing him, and saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?" 19:4 He answered, "Haven't you read that he who made them from the beginning made them male and female, 19:5 and said, 'For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother, and shall join to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh?' 19:6 So that they are no more two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, don't let man tear apart." 19:7 They asked him, "Why then did Moses command us to give her a bill of divorce, and divorce her?" 19:8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it has not been so. 19:9 I tell you that whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and he who marries her when she is divorced commits adultery."

05-10-2003, 11:53 AM	#18
AdamWho Contributor Join Date: May 2001 Location: San Jose, CA Posts: 13,389	If the husband were a true Christian he would read up on 1 Timothy 2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

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