echoes

I recently got a bid to join a fraternity... before I had been leaning against joining but now I am almost reconsidering.

The way I see it, the pros are:

1) Easy socialization
2) Cheap food that's better than the school's cafeteria food
3) An outlet for community service
4) Cheap housing if you live in the house

Cons:

1) Isolation from friends outside the Greek system, or in other fraternities
2) Less free time for socializing (more of your free time/socialization is dictated by the frat, eg social obligations during parties)
3) Poor study environment if you live in the house... which leads me to #4...
4) This fraternity in particular is low on numbers so it's possible that I'd have to live in the house, which would exacerbate the problem of con 1, and would cause con 4.

Are any of you infidels fraternity members? How is/was it?? I don't know anyone personally who is out of college that was in a fraternity, so I'd love to hear from anyone who has had some perspective on it.

Is there anything missing from my list of pros and cons? Are some of them not quite valid? Obviously there are ways around these... con #3 isn't so bad as you could easily go to the library to study, for example.

thanks

Secular Elation

What college are you attending?

mongrel

Why is it that the first thing that springs into my mind is Delta House?

echoes

Lafayette College, Easton, PA. Where rush begins fall sophomore year. IIRC, about 25% of men and 40% of women are in the greek system here.

kwigibo

If he joins Lambda Lambda Lambda that would solve #3

Marruk

I don't know about your fraternity, but all the ones at my school have very high monthly dues.

I never joined a sorority because I had much better things to do with my minimum $400 dollars a month depending on which one that I joined. Yet I also go to a school that has approximately 40,000 students so even without a sorority there are plenty of opportunities to socialize.

Never

Anything I say may not apply at all because 1. I went to college a long time ago and 2. I'm female.
I was in a sorority and overall it was a good experience. A few reasons why:
I was shy, so for me having some planned socialization was a plus. They forced me to talk - as in you have to talk to strangers at rush or you have to give your opinion in a meeting. I had to organize a philanthropic activity - me talk to other groups! I made great progress in getting over being shy which was immediately helpful when entering the working world.
The sorority was not the only group I belonged to. If I had to name my 3 best friends from college, one would be from the sorority and 2 from the band. You don't need to isolate from others just because you're in one group.
Living in a fraternity/sorority house has to be evaluated on a case by case basis. They're all different. The one I lived in (and a few others I've seen) had plenty of empty rooms that could be used for private study (and we were lucky enough to be 7 blocks from campus). Some do not have that at all. At the time, living there was cheaper than any other alternative.
If the group you are considering is low in numbers, find out why. Corner an upperclassmen not associated with the group and grill them. This doesn't necessarily have to be a reason not to join. Good groups can have low numbers, but it is a reason to check it out.
You probably won't know until (and if) you're a member, but be aware that you may find varying degrees of theistic content in these groups even though they are not billed as xian organizations.
Oh yes, it is probably irrelevant in these days of the internet, but at the time class files were a great help. Some professors never changed their tests!

Rusting Car Bumper

Cons:
Pledging to God...

I had a friend who was going through that silly recruiting process whatever its called. Anyway, he refused to say the pledge when it came up because it included God in the pledge.

He became a target for fundie conversion the next semester.

DC

echoes

Marruk: I'm not familiar with the exact nature of the dues, but what I've heard from older friends is that it is cheaper to live in a fraternity house and to eat there than to rely on college room and board.

Never: Those seem like excellent reasons, but I don't feel like they apply to me. I'm already involved in some other groups and have plenty of friends. Hell, the only thing really lacking in my social life right now are women. You bring up a good point, I'll try to see if I can find out why the numbers are so low. Also, I suppose I probably exaggerated in my mind con #1.

Digital Chicken: Yeah that is definitely something to look into...

thanks for sharing your opinions; I think at this point I may accept the bid and go through pledging, and I can always just drop out.

rock_hard_cox

I don't think that I would ever join a frat. To me, it would feel like I was buying friends.