Jamie_L

I've recently had conversations with my wife and friends in some detail about my skeptical nature than my skeptical views of commonly believed paranormal stuff (psychics, mediums, prophetic dreams, etc.). And always, the conversations, no matter with who, come back to some variant of: "I saw this" or "I experienced this" - some strange event like a psychic prediction coming true (supposedly) or some amazing performance by John Edwards, followed by "how do you explain that?"

Why is not having an instantaneous counter-explanation to "it's paranormal" perceived as such a weakness to the skeptical viewpoint? If I claimed pink gremlins were causing the oil leak in my truck, and then charged my wife with coming up with a better explanation, she'd think I was bonkers.

On a second note - do any of you skeptics run into the problem of a friend asking you to explain their own personal psychic experience? Thus, forcing you to either back down or say something that may come off sounding like accusing them of a lack of sanity or faulty reasoning? A good friend of mine has on occasion thought he has had prophetic dreams, and he believes he has seen ghosts. I have lots of explanations for why people believe these things (confirmation bias, self-deceptions and back-reconstruction of memories, etc.), but using those explanations to explain his experience feels like I'm insulting him.

As my wife says, "he thinks you're crazy."

Sigh. Oh well. I guess that's what I get for being a skeptic in a credulous world.

Jamie

Lord Asriel

Because the truth is so much harder to understand and come to terms with than a comfortable untruth.

Many people have trouble with ambiguity. As such, they much prefer an explaination like "There is a ghost in my house" (for example) to someone saying "I don't know what it was, I only know what it wasn't." Certainty provides answers. Ambiguity presents the horrifying prospect of having to think about it

As to your second point - it can be awkward sometimes. When people discover that you have a skeptical stance, they take it as an instant invitation to confound you with some tale of the paranormal that happened to them, well, maybe not to them, but to a friend of theirs, well, a friend of a friend...

I make no secret of my beliefs to my friends, and they now accept that I will not believe any of these stories whenever they come up in conversation. I don't attempt to convert them to my thinking, and so we find a comfortable equilibrium.

With people that I don't know so well, I guess that's a good opportunity to see if I want to get to know them better.

butswana

People want quick, easy to grasp answers to everything. If you say you don't know something, it makes them feel better about thier unfounded beliefs. To them skepticism is weak because everything cannot have an easy explaination.
It's damn near impossible to come off like you don't think they're delusional because you don't share their delusions. State your skeptcism/unbelief, and you are the delusional one in thier eyes. It comes with the territory.

Ernest Sparks

No, I don't think they are "looking" for answers. Instead, they already have them. Their beliefs are already formed. They want to challenge you as an unbeliever. They are not about to accept your replies.

Michael Shermer (Skeptic and Scientific American magazines) said that he thinks there is a "belief" center in the human brain, and that there was probably some early survival value in having it. The belief switch for these matters is already turned on. The phenomena serve as confirmation, and there is no desire for refutation. We are a forward-thinking species and definitely tend to get concerned about the ultimate meanings of life, the universe, and everything.

It is better to elicit the person's belief about the matter--bring it out in the open. Ask them what the consequences of their belief are as it effects their lives and associations with others. This is a pragmatic criterion. Perhaps you can persuade them that carrying on so about paranormal experiences is not such a good idea for themselves. Don't be surprised if they choose to cut the discussion off.

[ November 19, 2002: Message edited by: Ernest Sparks ]</p>

elwoodblues

The "how do you explain this?" argument is ridiculously easy to make. This is why you hear it all the time. All the arguer has to do is point to some area in which they are ignorant, and say 'How do you explain this?' By the time you've taken the time to research, consider, theorize, and provide possible explanations for the phenomenon, the arguer has already moved on to four other, separate issues that they are ignorant about.

The argument is painfully easy to make. This is why I stopped arguing against it long ago, and just started buying people books. Sometimes I'll haul off and do my stand-up education act, but only for shits and grins.

thebeave

I have this problem too. I went out with a woman who was both highly sensitive concerning challenges to her beliefs, and at the same time, believed in some really kooky things. Mostly, I ended up just saying something like, "Hmmmm... that's interesting!". What I really was thinking: "That's about the lamest thing I ever heard. You'd have to be a moron to believe that!". The dumbest thing was when she said she thinks she is psychic because when she was about 10 years old, she predicted she would be no taller than 5'-5"" tall when she grew up. Sure enough, she is 5'-5"". What are the odds??!! It's amazing!!

AbbyNormal

This happened to me just a couple of weeks ago with my girlfriend. She has seen John Edwards perform and she has gone to a psychic herself. She thought it amazing that J.E. was able to pick out a single person in the audience. I tried to explain to her about cold readings/hot readings, plants, etc. She just shook her head saying that, maybe those things can be done, but that's not what happened this time.
She had a psychic ask her once "How long has it been since you left Missouri?" supposedly out of the blue with no info on her past. (She grew up in MO). This was immediately followed with "how do you explain that?".
I sympathize with your dilemna....I certainly don't want her to feel stupid, and I don't want to insult her in any way....but it's so obvious to me that she's being taken for a ride. How did the "psychic" know about MO? I don't know, I don't have an immediate explanation...I wasn't there. Maybe she had on a shirt that said "Missouri" on it, maybe a conversation in a waiting room was overheard. I had no answer beyond "well, sounds like a neat trick, I'd love to know how she did it". Errrrrrr.

Late_Cretaceous

How did the psychic know the woman was from missouri/

Maybe the woman just said "Show me" one too many times. Eh?

AbbyNormal

eh

Love the name, Abby.