Freethought & Rationalism Archive

pescifish · 12-23-2002, 06:59 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip:
We talked about this insane schedule she's keeping, and she agreed that it was the time spent apart, NOT my damn lack of belief, that was getting between us. She's going to stay with the day time job for a couple more months then quit. Amen.

Amen, indeed!

Have a great holiday and hopefully your family will have a chance to relax.

seebs · 12-23-2002, 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip:

We talked about this insane schedule she's keeping, and she agreed that it was the time spent apart, NOT my damn lack of belief, that was getting between us. She's going to stay with the day time job for a couple more months then quit. Amen.

YAY! That is indeed very good news.

Good luck with the talking-to-pastor. It can be hard talking to people who really want you to believe something you don't.

Proxima Centauri · 12-24-2002, 06:32 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip:

B. Shack, fear not; her father wouldn't dare strike her. He did when she was a child, unfortunately, and certainly could bear part of the blame for her insecurity. They are a lot closer than ever now, and the "what for" were actually my words, not his. He just supported my position, that god wasn't worth losing her family.

(I'm reassured I'm glad you have much needed support.)

Let me tell you all something for some background: shortly after I confided my loss of faith to her, she started working a day job. She also kept her night job, so was (and still is) working 80 hours a week. I was strongly against this, but she claims we need the money. I constantly tell her we don't need the money THAT bad.

Our marriage is worth more than a (slightly) bigger bank account.

Vicar (about to blow the dust off the rum bottle)

Take care to limit what you take from the rum bottle during crises. You need all the self control you can get.
You and your wife need to cut down on unecessary luxuries. Sometime during or after Christmas, when you are not rowing discuss where you and she can make economies. That way, hopefully, you and your wife won't be tempted to work all the hours God doesn't give to pay the bills. You and she both admit that is part of the problem.

Sorry you have been having so much shit. We all feel for you. They wouldn't usually let me use a word like that on this library computer but I think they'll understand the context.

Proxima Centauri · 12-24-2002, 06:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip:


Anyway, tonight we went to my work xmas party. Sounds harmless, right? Well I was joking around with one of the single girls at our table, and my wife suddenly turned into a bitch at that point. Heaven forbid I kid around with my co-workers, you know. She claimed I wasn't talking to HER at all, which of course isn't true. She proceeded to tell the friend how I "flirted" with another girl and had ignored her the whole night. She then teared up and went back out to the van, where she stayed until I came out with the kids.

WHAT A CROCK OF SHIT. I'm so fucking pissed off I can barely hold my rosary.

What a load of double standards. She feels free to threaten divorce and to look for a Christian man. You can't even talk to another woman when she's around as a chaperone.

Proxima Centauri · 12-24-2002, 06:47 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip:
After she got home from work last night, we actually made up.

We talked about this insane schedule she's keeping, and she agreed that it was the time spent apart, NOT my damn lack of belief, that was getting between us. She's going to stay with the day time job for a couple more months then quit. Amen.

So, with the white flags unfurled and flapping in the wind, I'm giving all you infidels (& Helen) a hearty handshake, slap on the back, and a Merry Winter Solstice indeed!!

Vicar

Thanks, I'll try and have a merry Winter Solstice and after.

She wouldn't be able to keep up any insane schedule if she left you. Her living standard and that of the kids would drop drastically. Has she considered this?
If you both make economies that could help give her a preview of what her new living standard would be like if she were to divorce.
Push the point about the lower living standard after divorce slowly and gently, otherwise it could make her even more insecure.

[ December 24, 2002: Message edited by: B.Shack ]

Vicar Philip · 12-26-2002, 12:13 PM

Greetings, infidels, and a warm welcome to the new Secular Support forum.

I thought I'd kick things off with a return to my little saga.

Christmas went pretty well, actually, all things considered. We were buying the remainder of the kids' gifts Christmas Eve and stayed up late wrapping them. They were happy.

I think my wife is slowly beginning to accept my lack of belief, even though she'd never admit it. Given enough time I might even be able to get her to come around to my way of thinking.

I'm presently in the middle of an excellent essay by Joseph Lewis, The Bible Unmasked. Next time we get into a discussion I'd like to bring up some of those stories with my wife. It's hard to deny something when it's right there in black and white, in YOUR OWN precious bible.

Hope everyone has a prosperous New Year.

Vicar

HelenM · 12-26-2002, 12:40 PM

I'm glad Christmas went pretty well for you, VP. It's wonderful to hear that your wife is showing you a bit more acceptance.

I hope you and your family have a prosperous New Year too!

take care
Helen

Vicar Philip · 12-26-2002, 01:36 PM

I'm sorry, I didn't realize all the older threads were being moved here.

Can you move these two messages to the old "Strummin' for Jesus" thread?

I know you have nothing else to do!

Maverick · 12-26-2002, 07:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip
I'm sorry, I didn't realize all the older threads were being moved here.

Can you move these two messages to the old "Strummin' for Jesus" thread?

I know you have nothing else to do!

Well that's really cool! I can now merge threads! Sorry, now back to your regularly scheduled thread.

Maverick - Moderator

southernhybrid · 12-27-2002, 03:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Vicar Philip

I think my wife is slowly beginning to accept my lack of belief, even though she'd never admit it. Given enough time I might even be able to get her to come around to my way of thinking.

Vicar [/B]

That's the best news you've shared with us.
That's very encouraging to hear.

12-26-2002, 12:13 PM	#276
Vicar Philip Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Cozy little chapel of me own Posts: 1,162	Strummin' for Jesus Greetings, infidels, and a warm welcome to the new Secular Support forum. I thought I'd kick things off with a return to my little saga. Christmas went pretty well, actually, all things considered. We were buying the remainder of the kids' gifts Christmas Eve and stayed up late wrapping them. They were happy. I think my wife is slowly beginning to accept my lack of belief, even though she'd never admit it. Given enough time I might even be able to get her to come around to my way of thinking. I'm presently in the middle of an excellent essay by Joseph Lewis, The Bible Unmasked. Next time we get into a discussion I'd like to bring up some of those stories with my wife. It's hard to deny something when it's right there in black and white, in YOUR OWN precious bible. Hope everyone has a prosperous New Year. Vicar

12-26-2002, 01:36 PM	#278
Vicar Philip Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Cozy little chapel of me own Posts: 1,162	Uh... mods..... I'm sorry, I didn't realize all the older threads were being moved here. Can you move these two messages to the old "Strummin' for Jesus" thread? I know you have nothing else to do!

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12-26-2002, 12:40 PM	#277
HelenM Veteran Member Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Ill Posts: 6,577	I'm glad Christmas went pretty well for you, VP. It's wonderful to hear that your wife is showing you a bit more acceptance. I hope you and your family have a prosperous New Year too! take care Helen

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