Brian K.

Well...would/do you. Perhaps keeping you child from going to sunday school with his/her best friend. If so, is that any different that christians teaching their beliefs on tv etc. If not, then why? Just wandering because I think every person should decide for themself, but i want to hear what you all think.

Jamie_L

I have two kids under age 3. I have thought a lot about what I will teach them WRT religious beliefs. I am an atheist. My wife is a non-religious theist (not a member of any particular religion - in fact, often skeptical and disdainful of organized religion - but a believer in some kind of higher power).

Right now, my plan is to not teach them anything about religion myself, but also not to shield them from it. When they start getting exposure, I plan to talk to them about it and answer any questions that I have. I will tell them what I believe. I will tell them what others believe.

My main goal is to teach my kids critical thinking skills so that they can judge for themselves. I haven't quite figured out exactly how to do that, but I'm working on it. I also want them to be aware that not everyone believes the same thing, and it's okay to question what the majority says and believes.

Jamie

Brian K.

That sounds very reasonable.

2tadpoles

I'm with Jamie_L. My boys are ten and almost-seven. We talk about religion whenever they feel like asking a question. They have, on occasion, gone to church with a friend. I won't allow it to become a habit, though. I don't mind exposure, but I do not approve of indoctrination. And anyway, the only churches they've been to are Christian ones. If we lived in a more diverse community and they could attend different churches with their friends, I wouldn't mind so much. We don't teach them our beliefs as in "this is the truth" or "you should believe this"....but they do know what we believe. They also know that they should think for themselves and discover their own beliefs.

My older boy has thought quite a bit about religion (side effect from his brief stint in Boy Scouts). He is agnostic. My younger boy is what I would call a weak atheist (side effect from traumatic experience at Vacation Bible School...lol....for real). I am an atheist/pantheist, and my husband doesn't label himself as anything but he falls into the humanist category.

Nice to see another person with thinking skills in Hampton Roads. :-)

Tangie in Suffolk

[ July 03, 2002: Message edited by: Frogsmoocher ]</p>

kookiejar

I have two boys 13 and 12, and they have both attended church and own their own bibles. We also have copies of the Koran and the apocrypha lying around in case they are interested. Brian K is right that anyone, be it xian or atheist, who indoctrinates their children is doing them a grave disservice.

By the way, so far my boys have come to the conclusion that godstuff is just a heaping pile of steaming crap. Good boys.

Brian K.

*Blush* thanks for the remarks tangie.

nyx

kookiejar-I can appreciate that.
My 9 year old tested the tooth fairy by placing a tooth under the pillow without telling anyone. Hmmm.

My 11 year old wonders at how his Mormon friend's father can reconcile earning his living from Coca Cola. Another Hmmmm.

My 15 year old identifies himself as a freethinker. He has much exploration in front of him.

Now, what I'm struggling with as a parent, is their need for identification with a group, or discomfort in lacking a label. They are surrounded by Xians and find themselves challenged often. We encourage them to think for themselves at all stages but see that this can be difficult with outside pressures.

Any thoughts?

Nyx

ksagnostic

I don't so much teach my daughter my beliefs so much as I am honest about my beliefs. My wife was an atheist, who, over the years, moved in a more agnostic/hopeful deist type direction. I remained an agnostic.

We live in an area heavily influenced, although not really dominated by, fundamentalist Christianity. In order to find support for ourselves as a family, we tried the Unitarian Church a few times, but didn't really fit in. We also tried to put out feelers for perhaps finding a non-theist/freethinking family group, but all we got were a couple of evangelist responses. We were actually considering trying a couple of very liberal, nominally theist denominations when my wife died. Now, my daughter and I are going to the Unitarian Church, and I am still not really wild about them, but I like the minister (it takes a real gift to come up with relevant topics of discussion for an audience of agnostics, atheists, deists, unitarian theists, buddists, and wiccan type pagans). But then again, it also points out the most appropriate criticism of UU's, which is often that they are really not much more than a refuge camp. But, in the context of exposing my daughter to a variety of religious belief, UU definitely has its uses.

Back to my daughter, however. I do not tell her what to believe, but I am honest about what I believe, or rather don't believe. I don't think I can afford to remain silent and let nature take its course, either, in a climate where non-theists are increasingly demonized. One thing that helps is that my entire family is agnostic, so she hears supportive statements regarding non-theism from her grandparents and her aunt.

My daughter's exposure to biblical stories has been in the context of other fiction, rather than "pay attention because this is the history of GOD). As a result, when she saw Speilberg's animated movie about Moses (I am blocking on the name right now), she was naturally horrified when the first born sons of Egypt were all killed (as she pointed out, slavery is bad, but it wasn't those kids' fault).

I have found good supports for families of non-theists/freethinkers online, including this board and the parents place atheist parent support board (there used to be an agnostic support board there as well , but no longer). But either there isn't much of an interest in building local supports for non-theist families, or people are hesitant to stick their necks out. When it comes to protecting your children, I can understand the latter (when we put out the feelers that resulted in a couple of pieces of Christian spam, we did it with a cover address).

Edited to add the url for the atheist parenting support board for those who are interested. I know ohwillike is a regular on it, I think some others here are as well.

<a href="http://boards2.parentsplace.com/messages/get/ppatheist54.html" target="_blank">http://boards2.parentsplace.com/messages/get/ppatheist54.html</a>

[ July 03, 2002: Message edited by: ksagnostic ]</p>

nyx

I appreciate the information. I am going to check out the local Freethought Society. We'll see what the family involvement is like.

Nyx

Brian K.

thanks for responces