zachhanke

Hey All.

I'm a long time reader first time poster at these forums and I am in a bit of a religious predicament.

I am going into my second year of college, and during my freshman year I met a wonderful girl. Her parents are S-T-R-I-C-T Catholics. No nonsensical Bible bashing in their house (well, sensical Bible bashing isn't allowed either). They have 13 kids and my girlfriend is considered "the rebel" because she is dating someone outside of their religion. :down:

She is also on the verge of being kicked out of her house because she asked her parents if we could move in together during our second year to save some money. Her parents claim that it is a sin, and that her "anti-God attitudes" (I don't believe wanting to live with someone you love is anti-God, but...) are causing some of their other kids to be rebellious. According to them, she and I are going to hell for even thinking of such a thing. :wave:

So, I guess basically what I am asking is. What makes cohabitation a sin? Is it declared a sin in the Bible? Or is it simply another Catholic tradition?


P.S. - If you have any advice for me when it comes to my girlfriend's parents, I am all ears. :thumbs:

Thanks for Reading,

Zach

Toto

This site says that Catholics think that cohabitation is wrong, but doesn't come up with any Biblical support.

This evangelical site seems to have some problems finding a real Biblical basis. There is a lot of condemnation of "fornication" in the Bible, but it's not clear that includes premarital sex between people who are not married, as opposed to adultery or sex that violates some other standard (prostitution, adultery, etc.)

zachhanke

Yeah, I found those two sites earlier as I was Googling along...

It's interesting to see to see that new sins can be created by Catholics as they choose. :down:

Zach

CJD

You can tell those parents that "whatever is not done in faith, is sin" (so says the Bible). Then tell them you'll become Catholic. Then do it. Then move in with her. You'll find a lot of Catholics like you in there and feel right at home.

My advice,

CJD

Toto

Are you suggesting that zachhanke pretend to be a Catholic, after he has expressed such a negative opinion of Catholic's idea of sin?

Or just that many Catholics are similarly negative about their religion?

Or that a simple conversion ceremony would win the parents over?

Splarnst

First, Catholics don't limit their teachings to what can be found spelled out explicitly in the Bible. That's a very Protestant idea and one that drove me batty when I was a Catholic. If the Church wrote and defined the NT, then it's absurd to limit the Church's authority to what it has written. I would be like rejecting what an ordinary author said about some topic because he didn't explain it in his books.

Second, cohabitation is the same thing as fornication. It is explicity condemned in the NT. Just do a search.

Third, the Catholic teaching about sexuality is that all sexual activity outside of a valid marriage (no adultery, no fornication, no masturbation, no homosexuality) and open to life (no artificial contraception) is gravely wrong. It's not a new teaching. It's been around forever.

yummyfur

Well the complex sacrement of Marriage is something that slowly evolved from pre-christian Roman norms, with some Germanic stuff thrown in. In the early Church, no specific cermeony or anything was really needed (and it would be hard to even say it was a sacrement, formal marriage requirements become the norm in about the 11th century).

Actually any couple who cohabitated with the express intent of always cohabitating together were considered to be ok morally. Since Roman law excluded slaves and freed persons(as opposed to free) from matrimony (as Roman matrimony required consent, which these persons didn't legally have the right to). They could still cohabitate legally(with permission from patron or owner), but with certain restrictions on inheritance and class to their children, depending on the differnces in class between the two person(free and slave, freed and slave, etc.), if any. The Church had regarded these couples as fine as long as there was the intent of permanence.

So if you intend to premanently cohabitate with your girlfriend, and vice versa, and you have stated this intention to each other, you actually would be considered "married" by Roman law(as I'm assuming you or your girlfriend are not a slave or freed person ), and be considered totally kosher to the Church before say the 11th century(and in some instances even afterword).

FFT

Sources, please.

Splarnst

Let me retract that. I thought it was the same, but there may be some variations that I don't know about. That's the current teaching anyway.

zachhanke

Thank you all for your responses. They are quite helpful.