Diana,

By the way, I've been enjoying the Kasmar book tremendously. Most enlightening.

I knew I left it in good hands. Let me know if you do any more of those essays. Those were great.

John

Back to the OP, my Top 5 are:

2 Samuel 24:1
Again the anger of the LORD burned against Israel, and he incited David against them, saying, "Go and take a census of Israel and Judah." (NIV)
versus
1 Chronicles 21:1
Satan rose up against Israel and incited David to take a census of Israel

The difference in this one is rather subtle

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1 Kings 9:23
They were also the chief officials in charge of Solomon's projects--550 officials supervising the men who did the work.
versus
2 Chronicles 8:10
They were also King Solomon's chief officials--two hundred and fifty officials supervising the men.

Numerical differences are the hardest to explain away

****************
Genesis 1:25-26
God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. Then God said, "Let us make man in our image..."
versus
Genesis 2:18-19
The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them...

This is a good one when faced with creationists: "Okay, first of all, which creation story are you talking about: The one with the man before or after the animals?"

****************
Matthew 28:19
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations..."
versus
Matthew 10:5-6
"Do not go among the Gentiles or enter any town of the Samaritans. Go rather to the lost sheep of Israel."
and Matthew 15:26
He answered, "I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel." (a few verses later he contemptuously refers to Gentiles as "dogs")

To many fundamentalists I know, Matthew 28:18-20 is Jesus' most important quote (especially those groups who are focused on evangelism, i.e. recruiting). Nowhere did Jesus ever say to go after the gentiles, so the apostles must've no doubt been confused by this... at least until Peter's vision in Acts 10-11. Some feel these verses were an interpolation to jive with the tacked-on Mark 16:14-20

*************
1 Corinthians 15:5
...and that he appeared to Peter, and then to the Twelve.

This is my favorite. How could Paul "forget" Judas? Of course, this book was written before any of the gospels. I have yet to see a good reason for this "apparent discrepancy".

I don't think anyone posted this yet...

Matt. 12:40 "For as Jonas was three days and three nights in the whale's belly; so shall the Son of MAN be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth"

But Jesu spent 2 nights in the ground...

John:

Sorry to tack this here, but I seem to have lost your e-mail address. I've added an essay or two to my sacreligion section, but there's a bit less humor there than usual. Military training left me with mental fatigue. I did write up a short piece on the military's saturation with religion, if you're interested. I'll get back to bible stories soon enough, though. It's one of my favorite pasttimes...

diana

Hello all,
This is my first post here, but have been reading the messages on this board for about a year now and have found it very enlightening. I thought I would add some thoughts on this topic as well so here goes:

Many Christians aren't even clear on the passages relating to the Garden of Eden. Many seem to take the stance that we were immortally both spiritually and physically. This cannot be the case becuase they had not eaten of the tree of life yet, so Adam and Eve were going to die anyhow. Therefore, some Christians that know this facet say that God meant it to be a spiritual death. Of course the story is just a fabel as any book is that has a talking animal in it.

I also have one question I have not seen answered yet, and that is, if Adam was the first human being created, then he must have had nipples right? or no? The default egg has all the traits of the female minus the male becuase without the inheritance of the male chromosomes, no male could come about.

Grumpy,
Did Judas die by throwing himself headlong on a field he owned until his bowels gushed out? Or was he hanged on a tree, and buried in a field bought by someone else?

The usual response on this contradiction is that Judas hung himself and then the rope broke to which he then fell onto the field where his bowels then gushed out. Another good example where the bible is just not falisfiable.

One of my all time favorites is:
Gen. 1:26(KJV)And God said, let US make man in OUR image.
Oh really; you mean there's more than one god?Christian response is normally "well, he was refering to the angels,..hmmmm..then that would mean that the angels created man also(but of course xtians disagree w/out any valid explanation) Hell, this is the first damn chapter of the book and already contradictions!!

Another one is:
Is. 45:7 I make and create evil. I THE LORD DO ALL THESE THINGS.
I reallly love this one, because when in debate with xtians, I always bring up the topic of natural disasters, disease, retardation, rape and murder of innocent children, etc. Of course they always say that god isn't responsible for these tragedies and "god doesn't create evil". Then I tell them to read Is.45:7 and to shut their hole!!

One thing individuals must realize is that newer translations of the bible(NIV) have changed wording and attempted to correct the contradictions(once more, proving that the contradictions exist)

The granddaddy of contradictions - a meta-contradiction, if you will - is 1st Corinthians 14:33 "God is not the author of confusion" vs. all other Biblical contradictions (assuming God is the author of the Bible).