FRDB Archives

Freethought & Rationalism Archive

The archives are read only.

Go Back   FRDB Archives > Archives > Biblical Criticism - 2001
Welcome, Peter Kirby.
You last visited: Today at 05:55 AM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 02-17-2001, 08:38 PM   #1
Posts: n/a
Post What if someone goes to Heaven...

..and decides it's so damn boring that he wants to kill himself?

I mean, eternity is a long time to have to hang out with a bunch of Baptists.
Old 02-17-2001, 08:50 PM   #2
Posts: n/a

Actually, the correct answer is "Mormon."
Old 02-17-2001, 09:05 PM   #3
Posts: n/a
Red face

But only mormons who've never drank coffee.
Old 02-18-2001, 05:42 AM   #4
Posts: n/a

Good question,
I've often wondered what Christians think we'll be doing in heaven. The only general consensus is that there will be a great deal of singing. Comparing halos and strumming harps would get kind of boring after the first couple of trillion years.
One common answer is "We will be with God, and that will be good enough". Typical cop-out.
Could you really blame someone who wanted to kill themselves if they found themselves there, in a cacophanous din of millions of voices of Christian fundamnetalists, all praising their anthopomophic God ceaselessly?
Old 02-18-2001, 07:12 AM   #5
Posts: n/a

Along those lines, will there be sin in Heaven? I assume that we will still have our "free will" and that as humans we'll still have our "sinful nature", so I guess sin is inevitable.

But how could it be Heaven if there's still sin? (Or, since we earthlings have found that sin is usually much more enjoyable than, uh, morality: How could it be Heaven without tons of sin?)

Old 02-18-2001, 02:10 PM   #6
Veteran Member
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Portland, OR USA
Posts: 1,248

Actually, the Mormons have a pretty good system. It ain't all over when you die, get resurrected and judged. You might end up in a commodious situation, and there are upgrades.

Lookee at some of these:

Degrees of Glory


Eternal Progression

Celestial Kingdom

Terrestrial Kingdom

Telestial Kingdom


Spirit Prison

The Unpardonable Sin


Ernest Sparks is offline  
Old 02-18-2001, 04:47 PM   #7
Posts: n/a

What kind of mythos base did Joe Smith use when he concocted those states of the afterlife? They seem as wacky if not wackier than the mainstream Christian ideas of Heaven and Hell.
Old 02-26-2001, 03:15 AM   #8
Posts: n/a

What makes you think there will be any sensation of time passing in heaven?

1 Corinthians Cahpter 15

But someone may ask, "How are the dead raised? With what kind of body will they come?"

How foolish! What you sow does not come to life unless it dies.

When you sow, you do not plant the body that will be, but just a seed, perhaps of wheat or of something else.

But God gives it a body as he has determined, and to each kind of seed he gives its own body.

All flesh is not the same: Men have one kind of flesh, animals have another, birds another and fish another.

There are also heavenly bodies and there are earthly bodies; but the splendor of the heavenly bodies is one kind, and the splendor of the earthly bodies is another.

The sun has one kind of splendor, the moon another and the stars another; and star differs from star in splendor.

So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable;

it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power;

it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body.

So it is written: "The first man Adam became a living being" ; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit.

The spiritual did not come first, but the natural, and after that the spiritual.

The first man was of the dust of the earth, the second man from heaven.

As was the earthly man, so are those who are of the earth; and as is the man from heaven, so also are those who are of heaven.

And just as we have borne the likeness of the earthly man, so shall we bear the likeness of the man from heaven.

I declare to you, brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable.

Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed--

in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.

For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality.

When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory."

"Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?"

The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law.

But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Blessings and Peace

Old 02-26-2001, 05:31 AM   #9
Posts: n/a

If Christians follow the great commandment to love one another they will be miserable in heaven watching everyone else burning in hell. Hence hell for everyone.
Old 02-26-2001, 09:59 AM   #10
Posts: n/a

I've heard so many Christian descriptions of Heaven it's mind-boggling. The only thing they seem to agree on is that it's imperitive that we get there. They don't even know what it's like, except for vague generalizations. Basically I can surmise it's something like a fundamentalist sunday service, only that it doesn't end.

Millions of people just stand around praising God for all eternity. God looks out upon them, vaguely pleased at this sycophantry from vastly lower beings who he created to give him glory for the remainder of time. Those who would not be saved by Jesus burn forever in a giant barbacue pit, tormented by basketball team mascots.

Everyone seems to think their relatives will be in Heaven, but even if they are, are we supposed to care when we get there? Isn't our whole existence supposed to be for God? If our relatives were in Hell, should we care at all? Some people think that we'll continue earthly activities in heaven, like eating and sleeping. If we were wholly 'spiritual' entities or had 'glorified' bodies, of what use would eating, sleeping, etc. be? What would be the use of hair, teeth, hands, etc. in a heavenly environment?

Oh well...


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:07 PM.


This custom BB emulates vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.