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Old 05-13-2003, 12:10 AM   #11
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In the UK 'smacking' means being hit with an open palm anywhere on the body except the face (which would be slapping).

Spanking...heh heh...is a wholly more pleasurable activity, especially when involving monkeys.
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Old 05-13-2003, 12:12 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by JonathanChance
Actually, IIRC, "smacking" is considered striking a child anywhere on their body, except for the buttocks, so it's different than spanking.

Maybe our British and European Infidels can clarify this mater somewhat.
I was raised in the UK, and while smacking CAN be used for any part of the body, when refering to children it is considered bottom slapping. So it is definatly NOT exempting the buttocks at all.

And yeah, i can agree with banning nannies from doing it, but they shouldn't prevent the parents from doing it at all. Though anyone that requires a weapon to dicipline a child is a coward.
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Old 05-13-2003, 06:42 AM   #13
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I am of the opinion that limited smacking may have a place in the upbringing of a child, BUT only in extreme and necessary cases when all other discipline methods have been used. Unfortunately, children are generally speaking, the only people that are legally allowed to be assaulted with physical force. This is a strange conundrum and one that I have been reflecting on as I am a proud father of a 9 month old baby boy. I wanna do what right for him and what helps him most.
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Old 05-13-2003, 02:16 PM   #14
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Spanking is a hot-button topic for me. I have a (almost) 2 year old daughter, and I would never, EVER hit her.

People have this screwed up notion that "spanking=discipline" as if punishments were the only way to discipline. Discipline is something that a good parent does in every moment of every day with their child - NOT something they only do when their child misbehaves. Spanking is a tool used by lazy, lazy parents who don't know what it means to discipline a child...in my honest opinion.

Those of you without kids might not realize that there is a definite pro-spanking sentiment among fundies. They seem to think there is a biblical imperative to hit their children. It's one of the things that really frightens me about them. So the fact that they're fighting an anti-spanking law is no surprise.

Anyhoo...that's my rant. For some anti-spanking info, go to this site:
http://www.stophitting.com

beth
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Old 05-13-2003, 05:08 PM   #15
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I won’t ever say that smacking is absolutely right or wrong. It’s too grey AFAIC.

My father smacked us on rare occasions & I always wondered how I would turn out as a parent. Now I parent a 6 year old, as well as volunteering for a children’s disabilities group & I can say I’m fortunate to have never even felt the urge to smack & nor do I think I ever will.

But there’s every possibility that our little one is easier than others. I’ve seen children pull the worst behaviours, opening doors while the car is still moving, running out onto the street, refusing to wear seat belts … Their early cognition is a difficult time as they begin to realise that they have options other than obeying their parents, & their negotiating skills can be quite finely tuned from an early age, angrily rejecting all alternative forms of bribery and coercion. Sometimes I imagine the PC rules aren’t always enough & a desperately loving parent may well ultimately need to resort to the threat of a smack to deter the child’s actions.

If one is to smack though, I feel that the most important thing to remember is not to smack in anger. On those rare occasions, my father used to finally announce that a smacking was in order & it would occur in an hour’s time. Not only did this give everyone the time to release the anger of the moment, but the wait (for what I really probably deserved) was far worse than the smacking itself.
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Old 05-15-2003, 06:05 AM   #16
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I thought I posted this yesterday, but it was when the board had slowed down immensely, so...

Originally posted by sugarbeth
Those of you without kids might not realize that there is a definite pro-spanking sentiment among fundies. They seem to think there is a biblical imperative to hit their children.

beth, there is:

Proverbs 13
24 He who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

"Spare the rod & spoil the child" is Biblical, sad to say.

echidna
If one is to smack though, I feel that the most important thing to remember is not to smack in anger.

I agree totally. My mother always smacked me in anger - usually because I was having a screaming temper tantrum myself. At a very young age I got the message, "I'm angry because you're angry, and I'm going to hit you because I'm angry." Not very constructive.

TW
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Old 05-15-2003, 07:34 AM   #17
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Quote:
various previous posts
Sometimes I imagine the PC rules aren’t always enough & a desperately loving parent may well ultimately need to resort to the threat of a smack to deter the child’s actions.

***

People have this screwed up notion that "spanking=discipline" as if punishments were the only way to discipline.
It occurs to me to wonder if the parental urge to spank came before the criminal justice systems that basically threaten a "spanking" to criminals, or if the justice systems just codify a widespread tendency among humans to discipline by the application of pain/force?

I have a quote by author Glen Cook posted in my cubicle that seems to apply (at least to the legal system):

Quote:
The most benign government ever imagined has as its root assumption its right to apply force to the individual.
cheers,
Michael
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Old 05-15-2003, 08:22 AM   #18
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Quote:
Proverbs 13
24 He who spares the rod hates his son,
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

"Spare the rod & spoil the child" is Biblical, sad to say.
Dr. Sears (the well-know pediatrician who's christian and anti-spanking) interprets these passages a lot differently. The "rod" is assumed to be the rod a shepard uses to guide his sheep in the right direction. He doesn't beat the sheep with it.
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Old 05-15-2003, 09:00 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally posted by sugarbeth
Dr. Sears (the well-know pediatrician who's christian and anti-spanking) interprets these passages a lot differently. The "rod" is assumed to be the rod a shepard uses to guide his sheep in the right direction. He doesn't beat the sheep with it.
And he has every right to his interpretation, but it is the verse most commonly used by UK fundies to justify physically punishing their children.

TW
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Old 05-15-2003, 01:30 PM   #20
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Quote:
posted by Echidna
I feel that the most important thing to remember is not to smack in anger. On those rare occasions, my father used to finally announce that a smacking was in order & it would occur in an hour’s time.
I have a big problem with this. I don't approve of hitting children but I recognise that an exhausted parent who's been driven to distraction can lash out in anger - this happened to me a few times. But if it happens the parent can at least apologise and try and explain how they'd felt at the time.. They can say that it was the wrong thing to do - hurting people is wrong - and tell the child how much they love them. To actually inform a child that you are, in effect, going to commit a cold blooded assault on them in an hour's time - and then to keep your word and do it - would have undermined many of the values I was trying to instil in my children.
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