Pensee

In May of 1998, my then-boyfriend (now husband) and I found this teeny tiny kitten hollering in the woods. Her eyes weren't all the way opened yet. We called the SPCA, but they said they would have to put her down right away since she needed to be fed so often and they didn't have the manpower to do it. So we adopted her.

When she came "of age," I wanted to get her fixed but my tight-ass husband didn't want to pay for it. She therefore had three litters of kittens until he realized it was worth the pay. We were able to give all but two kittens away. We now have three cats total. They're all fixed.

We lived in the country at the time. My cats freely wander inside or outside as they please. They like coming inside, but if inside for too long, they will go stir crazy. They love going outside. They can't stand being cooped up inside for more than I'd say 10 hours.

Now we've moved 550 miles away from the country and into the city. We live in a small apartment. Right now, my cats are still in Mississippi. We're about to move again into a somewhat bigger apartment, so we're waiting until we move into the other apartment to bring them over. My folks are taking care of my cats in the mean time.

Here's the deal. My apartment complex will let me have pets, but they have a 2 pet maximum. I have 3. It's going to be $450 for the two cats, and to be honest, we really can't afford it right now. Not to mention that we risk being kicked out by having an extra pet. Another issue is that we will be in an apartment. I know they'll hate being inside all the time. They won't ever be able to go outside. They'll be miserable. Two of my cats are extremely, extremely furry. They shed a lot. My other cat sheds, too, but not to the extent of the other two. There will be hair all over everything in a tiny apartment. Then there's the issue of litter boxes. With three cats, I have to have at least two litter boxes. I don't know where we'll be able to put them. I really don't want to make my apartment gross with all the hair and litter boxes. Plus, since they'll be inside all the time, I'm sure the litter boxes will fill up faster than I can keep up with because I'll be working all day.

Anyway, I love my cats to death. I really do. Because of all of the above factors, I'm considering giving them away. There's this animal shelter in Mississippi with a no-kill policy. I'm going to try to talk with them and see what they have to say. I love them, and I can't imagine going through with it. In some ways, I think it would be better for both the cats and me and my husband. Would I be a horrible person if I did? What do you think I should do?

Godless Dave

I think the cats would be happier if you can find them a country home. They will miss you but, how can I say this tactfully, they're cats. They'll get over it faster than you will. I really don't think they'll be happy in an apartment after being outdoor cats all this time.

Pensee

Freak. I agree, but I just called that no-kill adoption center and they only take kittens. How f*d up is that? I don't know if I could find them another home. I don't want to give them to a shelter where they'd be killed.

eldar1011

Certainly not a horrible person.

You're willing to sacrifice keeping them as your own pets because you want something better for them. It's a tough decision and I don't envy you, but it seems clear to me that you'd be making the right choice.

As a pet-lover (-owner), you have a responsibility to your cats. Acting on that responsibility, given these circumstances, means that you will probably have to give them up. Ideally, they'd be able to stay with your folks. But, should that not work, I agree that a no-kill shelter would be the next best option.

I don't know much about cats, I'm more of a dog person. And I *am* a horrible person. With the new baby, I find that I have no patience with my dog. It's not fair to her, at all. Yet, I find myself unable to control my impatience. No, I don't beat the dog, but I'm very short with her and less tolerant of her occassional bad behavior. I've considered giving her up, simply because I have no patience. My wife won't let me, which is a good thing, because I'd probably give her up in a heartbeat.

*That* makes me a horrible person. You, on the other hand, are not.

Godless Dave

That's a tough one. Have you already signed a lease on your new apartment? Any chance you could rent a house or duplex instead?

This is why I don't have a dog. I have room for one now, but I don't know where I'll be in a few years.

Jewel

Damn, Pensee, you're in a tough situation. We had the worst time finding an apartment complex up here that would let us have all 3 of our cats. The one that did let us charged us a pet deposit of $250 + $90/mo to have them. Yep we paid.

I would be in knots if I were faced with giving up my cats -- I don't envy you. However, I think you are right on the money that they would be misserable living a completely indoor life. If they are really misserble they may start peeing on things (or otherwise marking things) -- not good.

I don't suppose your parents would take them on a more permanent basis?? Maybe you could offer to send them a bit of money for food and upkeep.

-Jewel

Immaculate Deception

No, you're not a bad person for thinking of finding a new home for them. However, I feel that you owe it to your cats to find a real home for them, not a shelter home. Put ads in the paper and meet the owners or else use word of mouth to find a good home. I think that's the least you can do for them. It'll be hard enough on them to leave the only owners they've ever known, let alone for them to go to a shelter...no kill or otherwise. Makes me sad just thinking about it, and I don't even like cats. Especially my neighbor's cat that likes to kill birds, rabbits, and squirrels in my yard...and to top it off, she doesn't even eat them. She just kills for enjoyment, the little bitch. I need to have a polite discussion with her owner...

Anyhow, that's my two cent's worth. My honest opinion. I hope that you figure out what to do and don't have any regrets, either way.

ID

Pensee

My dad and step-mom wouldn't take them. They already have 2 cats, 2 dogs, 2 ducks, and a bunch of chickens. When I stayed with them for a few months, my cats stayed on their porch. Our cats kept getting into pretty bad fights through the screen on the porch. It wasn't pretty. It also made her cat start marking his territory (i.e., peeing on everything in sight) all over the house.

Jewel

I see. It's too bad your parents can't take them. It doesn't sound like it's the ideal place for them anyway. It can be very difficult to intigrate adult cats.

I do hope you find a home for them (I don't suppose you'd consider seperating them -- it might be easier that way).

Daleth

Pensee,

That's a really rough situation. If you can find a no-kill shelter that will take adult animals, you're still probably going to find a waiting period of several months. Thing is, these places are hard-up for funding and have limited space.

I was a founding member of a tiny local animal rescue group. My apartment has been foster home to loads of stray and abandoned animals. (1 bedroom New York tiny apt.) We had good luck getting adult animals adopted. Here's what we did:

Make fliers. Use color pictures if you can. Post them everywhere, especially vet offices and pet supply stores. Ask your neighbors. Ask your friends. Put an ad in the newspaper. Ask your vet to mention it to clients who may be considering new pets. In ads o fliers, talk about your pets' personalities... make them "human," not just property. Maybe describe the animal in the first person, as if it's a personal ad.

It's not much, but it did work for us.

Dal