Freethought & Rationalism Archive

Gawdawful · 08-11-2003, 01:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Doctor X
What if heaven is Jewish?

Then pigs must be in hell.

Warren in Oklahoma, hell to me

southernhybrid · 08-11-2003, 05:54 AM

My parents are fundies and they told me when I was a child that there would be no pets in their heaven. And they wonder why I deconverted.

My dogs are atheists anyway and they think that heaven is on earth. Maybe I've been feeding them too much filet mignon.

Marduk · 08-11-2003, 09:08 AM

�My dogs are atheists anyway and they think that heaven is on earth. Maybe I've been feeding them too much filet mignon.�

My dog is a Zoroastrian

reminds me of a cat cartoon, the cats are napping in Heaven and one says "and this is different than our previous life how?"

HaysooChreesto! · 08-11-2003, 12:37 PM

My dog is highly religous. The sun rises and falls on his amount of contact with us. We feed him, give him water, shelter, and lots of attention and he loves us unconditionally. When we are not around he misses us horribly, but when we come back he is ecstatic. What else could we be but gods to him?
But he has reason to perceive us as deities. We actually exist.

Mathetes · 08-11-2003, 01:02 PM

Do animals that became extint before the Son was made flesh go to Heaven? Like the dinosaurs? Or the mammuths?

Is Balaam's donkey in Heaven?

Do a bacteria or a virus go to Heaven? Do prions go?

What about a dog that masturbates by rubbing himself against someone's ankle?

Doctor X · 08-11-2003, 02:01 PM

Indeed, does every sperm go to heaven?

--J.D.

P.S. Hey! Does every zygote go to heaven? That would be a pretty rotten eternity.

mark9950 · 08-11-2003, 07:15 PM

You can see the birds.

08-11-2003, 07:15 PM	#17
mark9950 Banned Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: midwest usa Posts: 1,203	Animals are already in heaven You can see the birds.

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08-11-2003, 05:54 AM	#12
southernhybrid Veteran Member Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: heavenly Georgia Posts: 3,862	My parents are fundies and they told me when I was a child that there would be no pets in their heaven. And they wonder why I deconverted. My dogs are atheists anyway and they think that heaven is on earth. Maybe I've been feeding them too much filet mignon.

08-11-2003, 09:08 AM	#13
Marduk Veteran Member Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: the 10th planet Posts: 5,065	�My dogs are atheists anyway and they think that heaven is on earth. Maybe I've been feeding them too much filet mignon.� My dog is a Zoroastrian reminds me of a cat cartoon, the cats are napping in Heaven and one says "and this is different than our previous life how?"

08-11-2003, 12:37 PM	#14
HaysooChreesto! Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: SoCal USA Posts: 7,737	My dog is highly religous. The sun rises and falls on his amount of contact with us. We feed him, give him water, shelter, and lots of attention and he loves us unconditionally. When we are not around he misses us horribly, but when we come back he is ecstatic. What else could we be but gods to him? But he has reason to perceive us as deities. We actually exist.

08-11-2003, 01:02 PM	#15
Mathetes Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Spaniard living in Silicon Valley Posts: 539	Do animals that became extint before the Son was made flesh go to Heaven? Like the dinosaurs? Or the mammuths? Is Balaam's donkey in Heaven? Do a bacteria or a virus go to Heaven? Do prions go? What about a dog that masturbates by rubbing himself against someone's ankle?

08-11-2003, 02:01 PM	#16
Doctor X Banned Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: USA Posts: 3,794	Indeed, does every sperm go to heaven? --J.D. P.S. Hey! Does every zygote go to heaven? That would be a pretty rotten eternity.

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