Cicero

"It wasn't me, the midget was on fire when I got there!"
--Rev Roger, to the mean religious cop who busted my friend's bachelor party in 1989

"DOOM. It's not just for the poor, anymore."
--Larry the Mountain Monk, just before his disappearance in 1996

"Put food on your family"
--President George W Bush, 2000 (no shit)


Doom is a subject that most people aren't comfortable with. Bring it up at a party and you will soon be drinking alone; mention it on the subway, and police will ask you all sorts of embarrassing questions.

Yet it is becoming impossible not to think about it, as the Bush years drag along. Whether you are concerned about your job, your liberty, or you (or your children) getting your ass shot off in a desert nation for reasons that no one, not even the president, can adequately explain, the Bush Era has something for you.

The twenty-somethings of today are a doomed generation, make no mistake. ALL of America has The Fear now, but my generation can remember a time when this wasn't so. Sure, we had Reagan and the Iran/Contra scandal, and Ron and Nancy's "War on Drugs", Meese's "War on Pornography", and a million other "Wars on un-Christian Shennanigans", but we knew it couldn't last. The perpetrators were simply too old to carry on much longer, or too corrupt. And we were right: Reagan is a drooling vegetable, Big Ed Meese wound up on the wrong end of a driving range with the ghost of Spiro Agnew...and the greatest hammerhead of them all, John Wayne (known as a Real American Hero, because he beat the living sh*t out of everything he couldn't understand) is 6 feet under.

What we failed to see was that they trained their successors well during their time in the wilderness, when the Big Dog was running the show, and doing truly spectacular things with cigars and plump young interns.

The happy-go-lucky days of the Clinton Era are gone now, swept away by the events of both 911, and the Bush administrations' absolutely insane policies of supply-side voodoo economics and Gestapo organizations such as HSD. The fun is over, kids, and it ain't coming back anytime soon...nor is it intended to.

Think about it: Why is Ashcroft chasing head shops (busting the likes of Tommy Chong in the process) over fricking marijuana while Al Qaeda regroups? Simple. They don't want to interfere with AQ's regrouping. AQ was good enough to come alonh on 911 and give Bush a mandate (try to remember what a joke he was BEFORE 911). I am sure that Ashcroft is feeling confident that there will be another "event" just prior to the 2004 election...Which will, of course, be "suspended" due to the emergency.

Are you ready for that?

Are you ready for El Presidente for Life Bush? Are you ready for the death of the republic, liberty, and the bare possibility that the fun might ever come back? Remember, friends, that the odious "PATRIOT Act was passed in October 2001, during the height of our national nervous breakdown. After ANOTHER such event, the Expanded Security Act of 2003 (aka: PATRIOT II) is a shoo-in. Say HELLLOOOOOO, secret arrests and warrantless searches, and GOODBYE to the 4th amendment. We have chain link compounds for freaks like you, and anyone who objects is OBVIOUSLY a terrorist sympathizer; just as anyone who objected to our little adventure in Iraq was instantly labelled a "Saddam-lover". And we have WAYS of dealing with sympathizers...

Trust me on this; I know the face of Doom, for I am the Right Reverend Cicero, Minister of Bubba's Salvation Church and Rib Shack (tm), and I speak directly with The Man.

Hey, it worked for Oral Roberts...

August Spies

"DOOM. It's not just for the poor, anymore."
--Larry the Mountain Monk, just before his disappearance in 1996

hahah what? can you elaborate on this quote?

Cicero

He was mentioning that the middle class was now just as f*cked as the poor.

He was talking about Gingrich's plans for the USA, if I remember correctly.