Viti

Exactly Farren. One of my clearest early childhood memories was a lesson in empathy...my parents bought me a hamster, put it in my hands, told me to feel the little heartbeat and movements, and said "this is a little life in your hands, his heart beats like yours, he feels pain like you do, and he is now your responsibility. How do you want to treat him?"

yguy

Nobody ever did anyone a damn bit of good by empathizing with them the way you empathize with your dog. If I thought Christ had that kind of empathy for me or anyone else, I'd spit on Him.

Sabine Grant

Bonjour Yguy... you used the word compassion earlier which IMO is different from empathy.
I will empathize with a human being who is suffering in various ways. However I think of compassion as a feeling I will have for a person who has been evaluated as "unworthy " of empathy. Empathy should not be too much of a struggle... we all have the ability to be moved by the needy conditions of another human being or anything alive for that matter.
However compassion does not come naturaly... we are more quick to put our thumb down than to apply grace.
I consider Christ to be able to empathize with human beings as he lived ( according to the Gospels) the life of a human being. He knew thirst, hunger, fear, loneliness, grief, anger, fatigue, homelessness, rejection, physical pain etc.... I am certainly glad He did.
The case of the adulteress implies an act of compassion as she was judged by jewish laws to be put to death by stoning. However, I believe that he empathized with this woman's terror and despair as her life was about to be taken from her.

yguy

Sabine,

Thanks for responding. I suspect we don't differ on anything more than semantics. The sort of empathy I have contempt for is the Clintonian "feel your pain" type, which condescends to make a person feel OK about his weaknesses. It lowers itself to allow you to sink lower; Christ lowered Himself so as to bring people with Him to the place He came from.

Dr Rick

I empathize with you; I feel your pain...

DRFseven

While I think empathy is important in moral development, it is not always used for compassionate purposes. Scam artists and sociopaths use their abilities to read people in order to manipulate them for their own gains. Empathy is thought to be an evolutionary development that has its roots in the infant's innate tendency toward facial mimicry, and progresses, under appropriate conditions (having to do with parent/child interaction), to the taking on of attitudes and feelings. Some people never develop the tendency toward empathy, and if they don't, there is nothing they can do about it, other than to try to fake it by close observation of others.

Sabine Grant

I understand what you mean but the method you describe as the Clintonian " feel your pain" is at times a necessity in counseling steps so the person may get in touch with those weaknesses and step two resolve them. Self condemnation is never productive. I think I can empathize with an alcoholic even though I am not an alcoholic. I think I can empathize with just about anyone if I look in them for what caused them to be " in the gutter" rather than loathe them for whom they became.
My point is that Christ had the ability to discern the mind and feelings as well as the intent behind thoughts and feelings.

You may be familiar with the expression " to look at people thru the eyes of Christ".... in that sense as christians we have a way to empathize with just about anyone. It is a challenge of course. We cannot help but attribute the worst intent to people whose actions we disagree with.

yguy

While this may be standard practice in use by many counselors, I have my doubts as to whether it does any good in the long term.

Agreed.

I don't see how not having empathy for someone necessarily means you loathe them. OTOH, it may prevent you from telling them what they need to hear, because you feel the pain the truth produces in them. You think Christ was empathizing with Peter when He told him, "Get behind me, satan"?

Sure, and everyone has that to varying degrees.

However, it is a mistake to overcompensate for this proclivity by walking on eggshells around such people, as it inspires contempt.

Clutch

That's the saddest thing I've read in quite some time.

yguy

Why?