orpheus last chant

In just a few words, my boyfriend showed up for our date, with his hands bandadged, right above the wrist.

We met two months ago, at a party. He's 18, i'm 16. We started dating, His impression of me was that I was like no other girl he'd met.
We went to movies, park, a friends house where the hole group met. Nothing unusual. We felt alike, both our fathers had died when we were little, but big enough to understand.
Both plunged into depression. Only his was far worse and active than mine.
He tried to commit suicide 3 times. Than a few years from the present date he got back to normal, he said.

This day, it was 35 C outside, and he came with a jacket. I thought he thought it was gonna rain. But he was wearing it. I am the kind of person who doesn't GET IT, when it's even not so subtle. I paid no attention. He was suppose to call me last evening, but he didn't. I called him the next day (today) and he told me he had some trouble.

At the movie place, it was the hole group, who all acted normally.
We got in, and he takes his jacket off, looks at me and says:
- I'm sorry!
i didnt' understand for what he was apologising for. One of the guys gives him the popcorn bag to hold, he holds it and says:
- See now?
I didn't see it. it was dark, and his bandages were the colour of the skin.
I finally notice one hand. And (stupidly) say:
-what happened to your hand?
He's like embarrased, then I finnaly notice and get it.
He keeps tellin me that he's sorry and that it was stupid, than I tell him there's no need to apologise to me.


I spent the next 30 minutes, trying to decide how to act. I decided to pretend it never happened. It was bizzare.

What to do? should this become a taboo? Should I let him confide, or ask him about it?
And for god's sake, why did he apologise to me? I never felt guilty like that moment.

The last date we had before this one was wensday. We met today, friday. He seemed absolutely normal then. it wasn't the best date ever, I was slightly annoyed for no apparent reason, and we had run out of subjects to talk about.

Thanks for reading the hole thing.

LittleGuy

I don't get it.
Please spell it out for dumbasses like me

beth

So, he cut his wrist? Did he have to go to the hospital, or did he do it just for attention?

Mister Impossible

He sounds like major Munchausen Syndrome material to me.

I say call it a day with him otherwise he'll just play on your sympathy for the rest of your life.

It might seem harsh but it has to be better for you in the long run.

Proxima Centauri

He probably deliberately injured himself. He knows how to say sorry in a way which makes you feel extremely guilty although you have done nothing wrong. He plays on your emotions. You are sixteen. He needs someone older and more mature than he is. You are too young to help him. I agree with Mister Impossible, he's not the right guy for you, sorry.

:boohoo:

Enai

http://mindprod.com/suicide.html

orpheus last chant

[QUOTE]He sounds like major Munchausen Syndrome material to me.[QUOTE]

Isn't that about being a patological liar? I really don't know if he did it to get MY attention. On the other attemps he nearly succeded, but his mother walked in. the wounds did not look like serious injuries. There were no cotton fibre patches (sorry but don't know the term in english)

I dont' know if I will brake up with him now, what would he think, what if this gets him more depressed? I don't know if I strike you as selfish, but I just ended a chapter in my life when i was forever sad, and did not trust my self. So i am just looking for simple, frivolous things. Normality, you may call it.

Looking back on what I've just written, I must have used I don't know a million times. But that's my state right now. I don't think I could ever talk to him, about my favorite band - nirvana (how could I), and even simple joke words sound bizzare (like hearin a pop song on the radio, and i say, oh, just dissapear). so i'll just let it drift on (he wants to see me, like every day, ) and maybe it will work out ?! sounds bad, but i'll go in a vacation in 2 weeks, and maybe the time apart will cut it.

Mister Impossible

I always thought it was compulsive attention/sympathy seeking. I could be wrong, though.

Please, please do not think that way. If you do, he will have you in his control forever.

Instead of viewing his cutting as a cry for help, think of it as a great, unspoken threat: "Leave me or upset me and you know what I might do.".

Is that what you want?

Viti

This is emotional manipulation. The fact is, you cannot be responsible for his choices...people like this will say things like "Look what you made me do..." you can't make him do anything. You need to do what's best for you and let this person sink or swim on his own. He needs professional help, not a girlfriend to pull under with him.

PS. Munchausen's is characterized by self inflicting injury or inducing illnesses to seek attention and sympathy.

Secular Elation

Are you thinking about leaving this guy?

If you do, it might be a good idea to make sure someone knows about his bad habits. If you did break away from him, there's a chance he'll snap.

But like Ladyshea said, you are in no way responsible for him. He is responsible for himself. If we went beserk because you broke up from him, that's his problem.