Freethought & Rationalism Archive

SLD · 03-10-2003, 07:54 PM

California Ministry Trying to Convert ET to Christianity

Quote:
"E.T. groups are skeptical about humans and are waiting to let George W. Bush destroy the planet before deciding what to do next."

SLDER

BrotherMan · 03-10-2003, 10:35 PM

They can't conver ET. Everyone knows he's a Jedi.

lunatic.retired · 03-11-2003, 02:32 AM

What the hell these dimwit xtians trying to do. Turn those aliens into christians next thing you now they will be wanting to become priests and then we gunna have us a whole bunch of peadophile aliens to deal with.

hells bells, we are still trying to sort the catholics out.

nuke em I say, just start sending every damn nuke we got up into outer space, waddufuck harm is it gunna do to us .

Gets rid of our surplus down here.

it would be a good use for the shuttle, shit, it don't seem to have to much trouble getting up there, it's just the coming down bit that seems to be the problem.

Just use xtian pilots and crew and tell em to pray to god, he will protect em.

Or maybe we can get us some of them muslim bomber blokes to do the job. Just tell them that if they actually get a little bit closer to god[literally speakin'] allah might chuck in a six pack of beers and maybe a cuupla good porno vids as well as the 97,000 virgo's or whatever it is they get when they promised.

I do wonder how xtians get through life with a brain the size of a pee and an iq of 3 [ when you need 2 to grunt]

Treacle Worshipper · 03-11-2003, 08:14 AM

Why do the aliens need god anyway? Did the fall affect every race in the universe? How did A&E sinning affect aliens? These Xians can't even work within their own theology!

:banghead:

TW

MzNeko · 03-11-2003, 09:39 AM

Actually I think it would be funny as hell if aliens landed and said "Hello, we have come to spread the gospel of Zortag to you!"

Alien missionaries...

Ensign Steve · 03-11-2003, 11:02 AM

Did you see the episode of South Park where the Mormons are trying to witness in Africa, so the Africans to go planet Marclar to get away from them, so the Mormons try to witness to the Marclar aliens and the aliens say "Okay, that's nice, thanks for dropping by" and totally roll their eyes at the Mormons. I thought I was going to die laughing!!

Jen

trying really hard not to notice how close to her home that church from the article is

03-10-2003, 07:54 PM	#1
SLD Veteran Member Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Birmingham, Alabama Posts: 4,109	Christians Out to Save Aliens California Ministry Trying to Convert ET to Christianity Quote: "E.T. groups are skeptical about humans and are waiting to let George W. Bush destroy the planet before deciding what to do next." SLDER

03-11-2003, 02:32 AM	#3
lunatic.retired Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: desolation row Posts: 58	nuke em nuke em nuke em What the hell these dimwit xtians trying to do. Turn those aliens into christians next thing you now they will be wanting to become priests and then we gunna have us a whole bunch of peadophile aliens to deal with. hells bells, we are still trying to sort the catholics out. nuke em I say, just start sending every damn nuke we got up into outer space, waddufuck harm is it gunna do to us . Gets rid of our surplus down here. it would be a good use for the shuttle, shit, it don't seem to have to much trouble getting up there, it's just the coming down bit that seems to be the problem. Just use xtian pilots and crew and tell em to pray to god, he will protect em. Or maybe we can get us some of them muslim bomber blokes to do the job. Just tell them that if they actually get a little bit closer to god[literally speakin'] allah might chuck in a six pack of beers and maybe a cuupla good porno vids as well as the 97,000 virgo's or whatever it is they get when they promised. I do wonder how xtians get through life with a brain the size of a pee and an iq of 3 [ when you need 2 to grunt]

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03-10-2003, 10:35 PM	#2
BrotherMan Regular Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: City of Dis Posts: 496	They can't conver ET. Everyone knows he's a Jedi.

03-11-2003, 08:14 AM	#4
Treacle Worshipper Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Wales, UK Posts: 931	Why do the aliens need god anyway? Did the fall affect every race in the universe? How did A&E sinning affect aliens? These Xians can't even work within their own theology! :banghead: TW

03-11-2003, 09:39 AM	#5
MzNeko Veteran Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Long Beach, California Posts: 1,127	Actually I think it would be funny as hell if aliens landed and said "Hello, we have come to spread the gospel of Zortag to you!" Alien missionaries...

03-11-2003, 11:02 AM	#6
Ensign Steve Veteran Member Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Augusta, Georgia, United States Posts: 1,235	Did you see the episode of South Park where the Mormons are trying to witness in Africa, so the Africans to go planet Marclar to get away from them, so the Mormons try to witness to the Marclar aliens and the aliens say "Okay, that's nice, thanks for dropping by" and totally roll their eyes at the Mormons. I thought I was going to die laughing!! Jen trying really hard not to notice how close to her home that church from the article is

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