Freethought & Rationalism Archive

gilly54 · 03-14-2003, 10:20 PM

I don't know how many of these we can come up with but here are two of mine:

baptism: a religious sheep dip

pews: a place where asses go

gilly54 · 03-15-2003, 09:06 AM

The communion wafer: light, tasteless, with not too much body to it.

Easter: where the Catholic faithful reach critical mass.

Huginn · 03-15-2003, 09:28 AM

Jesus: sandal wearing nutcase

Church: where the most boring stand up comedians work.

Vicar Philip · 03-15-2003, 10:06 AM

The Rosary: a really cool necklace that'll kill two hours

Altar Boy: a young male in the church who services the altar, the chalice, and the Father

Confessional: a place where you kneel and give the priest some kinky new ideas for sex

gilly54 · 03-15-2003, 04:02 PM

chalice: the "common" cup, where all you get from it is a common cold.

(I couldn't come up with any double entendres in this one.)

King's Indian · 03-15-2003, 04:13 PM

Yahweh: collector of foreskins.

poopoo1970 · 03-15-2003, 07:32 PM

crucifixion: cruci-fiction

trinity: way to trick polytheists into joining your new club

the Pope: guy with a hat

immaculate conception: last-second, game-winning ejaculation! Sports fans, who can forget the "Ice Bowl," the "Thrilla in Manila," the "Immaculate Ejaculate"?

feast of assumption: dinner celebrating what every christian indulges in every single day

Jesus: guy with a Manson Complex

Huginn · 03-17-2003, 09:54 AM

Easter: when christians come together to worship a large egg-laying rabbit.

ExTheist · 03-17-2003, 01:08 PM

Communion: swallow the leader

ody · 03-17-2003, 04:10 PM

Not so much a new definition but a question of old:

If Jews are waiting for the coming of Christ, are they in essence waiting to be Catholic?

03-14-2003, 10:20 PM	#1
gilly54 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: New Almaden, California Posts: 917	Atheist definitions of religious thingies I don't know how many of these we can come up with but here are two of mine: baptism: a religious sheep dip pews: a place where asses go

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03-15-2003, 09:06 AM	#2
gilly54 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: New Almaden, California Posts: 917	The communion wafer: light, tasteless, with not too much body to it. Easter: where the Catholic faithful reach critical mass.

03-15-2003, 09:28 AM	#3
Huginn Veteran Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: Lincoln, England Posts: 1,499	Jesus: sandal wearing nutcase Church: where the most boring stand up comedians work.

03-15-2003, 10:06 AM	#4
Vicar Philip Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Cozy little chapel of me own Posts: 1,162	The Rosary: a really cool necklace that'll kill two hours Altar Boy: a young male in the church who services the altar, the chalice, and the Father Confessional: a place where you kneel and give the priest some kinky new ideas for sex

03-15-2003, 04:02 PM	#5
gilly54 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: New Almaden, California Posts: 917	chalice: the "common" cup, where all you get from it is a common cold. (I couldn't come up with any double entendres in this one.)

03-15-2003, 04:13 PM	#6
King's Indian Regular Member Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Croydon: London's Second City Posts: 144	Yahweh: collector of foreskins.

03-15-2003, 07:32 PM	#7
poopoo1970 Junior Member Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: New Orleans Posts: 41	crucifixion: cruci-fiction trinity: way to trick polytheists into joining your new club the Pope: guy with a hat immaculate conception: last-second, game-winning ejaculation! Sports fans, who can forget the "Ice Bowl," the "Thrilla in Manila," the "Immaculate Ejaculate"? feast of assumption: dinner celebrating what every christian indulges in every single day Jesus: guy with a Manson Complex

03-17-2003, 09:54 AM	#8
Huginn Veteran Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: Lincoln, England Posts: 1,499	Easter: when christians come together to worship a large egg-laying rabbit.

03-17-2003, 01:08 PM	#9
ExTheist Regular Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Earth Posts: 238	Communion: swallow the leader

03-17-2003, 04:10 PM	#10
ody Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Athens, Ohio, USA Posts: 16	Not so much a new definition but a question of old: If Jews are waiting for the coming of Christ, are they in essence waiting to be Catholic?

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