Freethought & Rationalism Archive

Typhon · 07-12-2002, 12:16 PM

I'm not sure I'd want the mythical God of the Bible to be driving a 2 ton vehicle through heavy traffic.

Considering what he did to unbelievers and the many foes of the Israelites in ancient times, he might just decide it was time to catch up on unfinished business.

But then, he does already have an army of white SUV driving Xians and frat boys for that I suppose.

Cheers,

.T.

Yellow3 · 07-12-2002, 12:28 PM

Spend some time in California's Bay Area, especially down in the southern end of it. I do keep an eye out for Porches or Camaro-type cars, and if it's a little car with spoiler fins or something on it for no concievable reason that also usually spells trouble. But damn! I swear I've been almost mowed down by every type of car imaginable, and I *know* I've been tailgated by all of them! It ain't just Christians (or Asians, for that matter) that suck.

Repeat after me, people: the posted speed limit is *not* the minimum speed for the road, and me signaling intent merge does not mean that you speed up and force onto the shoulder until you go past because you always have to be first.

Argh.

- Jen

butswana · 07-12-2002, 12:53 PM

Most cars have steel or aluminum wheels, so GAWD should be able to handle it.

Samhain · 07-12-2002, 04:12 PM

Have you learned nothing?

Need I remind you that the holy Jebus is out scarring truck drivers on a daily basis!?

Splat · 07-12-2002, 06:57 PM

Now THAT's creepy.

"Just keep your eyes on the road son, and nobody will get hurt."

"Wh- wh- what do you WANT from me?!?"

"Only that which rightfully belongs to me. Now I'm going to slip my hand into your back pocket and pull out your wallet. I'm going to relieve you of all that cash with my Dad's name on it, and you're going to let me off at that truckstop down there."

"Th- that's all you want? My cash?"

"That and your undying and eternal devotion."

"Oh thank God--Oh! Sorry! I mean..."

"What are you so afraid of, my son?"

"Well, right when you touched by butt, I saw that guy ahead of me with the jesus fish sticker give me the finger. I was afraid he was telling me that you were going to...going to..."

"Don't be afraid my son. What did you think I was going to do?"

"Well, sir, I thought maybe you were going to give me one of those immaculate injections or something."

<lightning flash, big thunder...>

TO BE CONTINUED!

{OK, your turn...who's going to finish this?}

Samhain · 07-13-2002, 12:38 AM

*Quickly pulls the 10-foot-pole away from Splat's story*

chekmate · 07-13-2002, 08:26 AM

well, I have put Drivers that PISS ME OFF the most into 4 catagories:

30%-Old People
30%-Women
30%-People with Jesus Fish
10%-Old Women with Jesus Fish

Not to say that all women or old people or Jesus FIsh people are bad drivers, but they are the ones that piss me off the most.

Ultimate Atheist · 07-13-2002, 09:19 AM

Its funny that this topic came up. Just a few days ago my wife and I were driving along minding our own business. We were doing about 45 which is the speed limit in that area. An SUV with a middle aged guy driving was sitting on one of the side streets on the right. When we got about 10 feet from him he ran out in front of us. I had to slam on the brakes and came within inches of hitting him. The guy didn't even seem to notice. He just sped up and went about a block down the road. He made a left into a church parking lot and almost got hit by oncoming traffic. It was almost as if he was driving with his eyes closed.

My wife commented that maybe Xtians act like that because they think their god will protect them. I told her they do that because they're simple minded gits. So which is it? Simple minded gits? Protected by Jebus? Both? I think its a little of both.
<img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" />

Shadowy Man · 07-13-2002, 09:50 AM

There are many bad drivers.

There are many Christians.

There is bound to be a significant overlap.

Kassiana · 07-13-2002, 09:56 AM

My mother and I are the only people I know of who drive the speed limit. Everyone else either goes at least 5-10 miles under or over it. So all of you, Christian and non, Republicrat or Demoblican, NARAL supporter or ardent pro-lifer, are reckless lawbreaking maniacs.

To us, anyhow.

And is there anyone on here other than me who uses turn signals? I swear that in my 1 1/2 years of commuting 45 minutes to and from work, about 80% of the drivers don't bother using right turn signals and about 30% don't bother using left turn signals either! How about signaling for lane changes? When did it become acceptable to just do whatever the hell you want in a car without letting anyone else know so they can avoid an accident?

Grrr. Grrr. Grrr. Must...stop...now...before...rant...takes...over.. .life.....

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07-12-2002, 12:16 PM	#11
Typhon Regular Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Mount Aetna Posts: 271	I'm not sure I'd want the mythical God of the Bible to be driving a 2 ton vehicle through heavy traffic. Considering what he did to unbelievers and the many foes of the Israelites in ancient times, he might just decide it was time to catch up on unfinished business. But then, he does already have an army of white SUV driving Xians and frat boys for that I suppose. Cheers, .T.

07-12-2002, 12:28 PM	#12
Yellow3 Regular Member Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Riverside, CA, USA Posts: 212	Spend some time in California's Bay Area, especially down in the southern end of it. I do keep an eye out for Porches or Camaro-type cars, and if it's a little car with spoiler fins or something on it for no concievable reason that also usually spells trouble. But damn! I swear I've been almost mowed down by every type of car imaginable, and I know I've been tailgated by all of them! It ain't just Christians (or Asians, for that matter) that suck. Repeat after me, people: the posted speed limit is not the minimum speed for the road, and me signaling intent merge does not mean that you speed up and force onto the shoulder until you go past because you always have to be first. Argh. - Jen

07-12-2002, 12:53 PM	#13
butswana Veteran Member Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Indianapolis, IN Posts: 1,804	Most cars have steel or aluminum wheels, so GAWD should be able to handle it.

07-12-2002, 04:12 PM	#14
Samhain Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 7,735	Have you learned nothing? Need I remind you that the holy Jebus is out scarring truck drivers on a daily basis!?

07-12-2002, 06:57 PM	#15
Splat Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Hell, PA Posts: 599	Now THAT's creepy. "Just keep your eyes on the road son, and nobody will get hurt." "Wh- wh- what do you WANT from me?!?" "Only that which rightfully belongs to me. Now I'm going to slip my hand into your back pocket and pull out your wallet. I'm going to relieve you of all that cash with my Dad's name on it, and you're going to let me off at that truckstop down there." "Th- that's all you want? My cash?" "That and your undying and eternal devotion." "Oh thank God--Oh! Sorry! I mean..." "What are you so afraid of, my son?" "Well, right when you touched by butt, I saw that guy ahead of me with the jesus fish sticker give me the finger. I was afraid he was telling me that you were going to...going to..." "Don't be afraid my son. What did you think I was going to do?" "Well, sir, I thought maybe you were going to give me one of those immaculate injections or something." <lightning flash, big thunder...> TO BE CONTINUED! {OK, your turn...who's going to finish this?}

07-13-2002, 12:38 AM	#16
Samhain Veteran Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Southern California Posts: 7,735	Quickly pulls the 10-foot-pole away from Splat's* story*

07-13-2002, 08:26 AM	#17
chekmate Veteran Member Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Downriver Detroit Posts: 1,961	well, I have put Drivers that PISS ME OFF the most into 4 catagories: 30%-Old People 30%-Women 30%-People with Jesus Fish 10%-Old Women with Jesus Fish Not to say that all women or old people or Jesus FIsh people are bad drivers, but they are the ones that piss me off the most.

07-13-2002, 09:19 AM	#18
Ultimate Atheist Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Here Posts: 980	Its funny that this topic came up. Just a few days ago my wife and I were driving along minding our own business. We were doing about 45 which is the speed limit in that area. An SUV with a middle aged guy driving was sitting on one of the side streets on the right. When we got about 10 feet from him he ran out in front of us. I had to slam on the brakes and came within inches of hitting him. The guy didn't even seem to notice. He just sped up and went about a block down the road. He made a left into a church parking lot and almost got hit by oncoming traffic. It was almost as if he was driving with his eyes closed. My wife commented that maybe Xtians act like that because they think their god will protect them. I told her they do that because they're simple minded gits. So which is it? Simple minded gits? Protected by Jebus? Both? I think its a little of both. <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" /> <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" />

07-13-2002, 09:50 AM	#19
Shadowy Man Veteran Member Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: A Shadowy Planet Posts: 7,585	There are many bad drivers. There are many Christians. There is bound to be a significant overlap.

07-13-2002, 09:56 AM	#20
Kassiana Veteran Member Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: USA Posts: 5,046	My mother and I are the only people I know of who drive the speed limit. Everyone else either goes at least 5-10 miles under or over it. So all of you, Christian and non, Republicrat or Demoblican, NARAL supporter or ardent pro-lifer, are reckless lawbreaking maniacs. To us, anyhow. And is there anyone on here other than me who uses turn signals? I swear that in my 1 1/2 years of commuting 45 minutes to and from work, about 80% of the drivers don't bother using right turn signals and about 30% don't bother using left turn signals either! How about signaling for lane changes? When did it become acceptable to just do whatever the hell you want in a car without letting anyone else know so they can avoid an accident? Grrr. Grrr. Grrr. Must...stop...now...before...rant...takes...over.. .life.....

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