Freethought & Rationalism Archive

Howard · 07-05-2003, 05:56 PM

When I look back on my childhood years, there is one inescapable fact that I must accept: My parents hated me. Don't believe it? Well check this out: THEY MADE ME TAKE ACCORDION LESSONS.

Now I ask you� is that not the worst kind of abuse you ever heard of? I mean, they could have locked me in the cellar for days without food or water; or put scorpions in my bed when I was sleeping... like normal psycho parents. But no. They had to come up with a torture that lasted for almost five years.

To make matters worse, I have zero musical talent - a fact which all seventeen of my music teachers quickly discovered. After one or two lessons they would say to my mother: "The kid has NO talent, none. Zero, zip, zilch. For the love of God, stop this madness! Let him be a pimp or a hitman, anything but an accordion player."

Not only did I endure unrelenting pain from that horrid instrument, but it also destroyed what little chance I had for a social life. Random girls would stop me in the halls and say, "Are you the one who plays the accordion?"
"Yes," I would reply, clearly ashamed.
Then one or more of them would punch me in the stomach, really hard, and say, "We don't like you. We won't ever like you."

As I grew older and tried to put the whole wretched experience behind me, it would inevitably rear its ugly head. For instance, I could be talking to a lady in a bar, having a few laughs and making a bit of progress, when at some point I'd blurt out, "I play the accordion." Whereupon she'd say something like, "Y'know what? My boyfriend, who's a 350-lb biker with rabies, will be here soon. Maybe you should skedaddle."

I could go on and on but I'm sure you get the picture.

So� has anyone else suffered musically at the hands of well-meaning but misguided parents?

Stiletto One · 07-05-2003, 06:19 PM

Being the Chinese that we are, my parents tried to get me to try (a) the piano and/or (b) anything string-with-bow.

They lost. I play a trumpet.

I'm 17.

I just have more willpower than my mom: she's been trying to get me to join a swim team for years now. But I stay in shape, through rock climbing.

Meantime, do you still have an accordion? I think that anyone who plays an accordion is cool, just because...

:EDIT:
PHUNK parallelism.

elanah · 07-05-2003, 06:33 PM

Not really. I've taken piano and viola, and both were at my request. I was upset that my mother didn't let me take on a wind instrument, however.

Look on the bright side. You don't have to play anymore. And I'm sure there are plenty of women who appreciate a good accordian-playing man.

EspressoSnail · 07-05-2003, 08:07 PM

Yeah any Weird Al fans?

YouWannaDoWHAT? · 07-05-2003, 08:37 PM

My parents never made me start playing an instrument I didn't want to play, but they made me continue the ones I started off wanting to play but got bored of after the second week of lessons. I wouldn't really call that abuse, though... just a waste of time.

The Other Michael · 07-05-2003, 09:41 PM

Was it a door-to-door accordian lessons salesman like the one that convinced my parents it was the best thing for me to do?

In the very early 1960s the accordian guy on Lawrence Welk seemed to hold some significant levels of cachet.

Accordian can be OK - but all I ever got was "figure out how to play this" - maybe a smidgen of music theory in the 5 years would have made it all make a little more sense.

Bela Fleck has a number of albums of contemporary accordian out, and some of it is pretty decent stuff.

IIRC, I think one of San Francisco's many claims to fame is that it is the true home of the modern accordian.

cheers,
Michael

chanoc · 07-05-2003, 10:17 PM

Being made to go to church and Sunday school is abuse IMHO. To make matters worse I went to a Christian school from 3-7 grades. We had to go to church on Mondays at this school, and where made to memorize biblical scriptures. :banghead:

jayh · 07-06-2003, 06:31 AM

hehehe

I was given some accordian lessons when I was a kid, but my dad upgraded me from the little one to the full size 120 bass and I couldn't hold it, and gave up.

Over the years, accordians seemed to be best kept out of sight until I discovered zydeco....

now their starting to show in rock bands

j

Accordians are not played at nudist colonies, however....

ju'iblex · 07-06-2003, 05:01 PM

my best friend is chinese, and as such, had those parents who wanted her to play an instrument. She landed the accordion as well.

She's really very good though, can play some wonderful things. And, to boot, she has this brilliant upper body strength which i swear, could kill me if she tried hard enough.

Stiletto One · 07-06-2003, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by jayh
Accordians are not played at nudist colonies, however....

D00d!!! I DID NOT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THAT!!!

:banghead:

07-05-2003, 05:56 PM	#1
Howard Veteran Member Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Orlando, Fl Posts: 5,864	Musical child abuse When I look back on my childhood years, there is one inescapable fact that I must accept: My parents hated me. Don't believe it? Well check this out: THEY MADE ME TAKE ACCORDION LESSONS. Now I ask you� is that not the worst kind of abuse you ever heard of? I mean, they could have locked me in the cellar for days without food or water; or put scorpions in my bed when I was sleeping... like normal psycho parents. But no. They had to come up with a torture that lasted for almost five years. To make matters worse, I have zero musical talent - a fact which all seventeen of my music teachers quickly discovered. After one or two lessons they would say to my mother: "The kid has NO talent, none. Zero, zip, zilch. For the love of God, stop this madness! Let him be a pimp or a hitman, anything but an accordion player." Not only did I endure unrelenting pain from that horrid instrument, but it also destroyed what little chance I had for a social life. Random girls would stop me in the halls and say, "Are you the one who plays the accordion?" "Yes," I would reply, clearly ashamed. Then one or more of them would punch me in the stomach, really hard, and say, "We don't like you. We won't ever like you." As I grew older and tried to put the whole wretched experience behind me, it would inevitably rear its ugly head. For instance, I could be talking to a lady in a bar, having a few laughs and making a bit of progress, when at some point I'd blurt out, "I play the accordion." Whereupon she'd say something like, "Y'know what? My boyfriend, who's a 350-lb biker with rabies, will be here soon. Maybe you should skedaddle." I could go on and on but I'm sure you get the picture. So� has anyone else suffered musically at the hands of well-meaning but misguided parents?

07-05-2003, 06:19 PM	#2
Stiletto One Beloved Deceased Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 7,150	No, not really Being the Chinese that we are, my parents tried to get me to try (a) the piano and/or (b) anything string-with-bow. They lost. I play a trumpet. I'm 17. I just have more willpower than my mom: she's been trying to get me to join a swim team for years now. But I stay in shape, through rock climbing. Meantime, do you still have an accordion? I think that anyone who plays an accordion is cool, just because... :EDIT: PHUNK parallelism.

07-05-2003, 10:17 PM	#7
chanoc Banned Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Auke Bay, Alaska Posts: 422	Child Abuse Being made to go to church and Sunday school is abuse IMHO. To make matters worse I went to a Christian school from 3-7 grades. We had to go to church on Mondays at this school, and where made to memorize biblical scriptures. :banghead:

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07-05-2003, 06:33 PM	#3
elanah Regular Member Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Waukesha, WI Posts: 309	Not really. I've taken piano and viola, and both were at my request. I was upset that my mother didn't let me take on a wind instrument, however. Look on the bright side. You don't have to play anymore. And I'm sure there are plenty of women who appreciate a good accordian-playing man.

07-05-2003, 08:07 PM	#4
EspressoSnail Regular Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Kentucky Posts: 207	Yeah any Weird Al fans?

07-05-2003, 08:37 PM	#5
YouWannaDoWHAT? Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: New Zealand Posts: 66	My parents never made me start playing an instrument I didn't want to play, but they made me continue the ones I started off wanting to play but got bored of after the second week of lessons. I wouldn't really call that abuse, though... just a waste of time.

07-05-2003, 09:41 PM	#6
The Other Michael Honorary Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: In the fog of San Francisco Posts: 12,631	Was it a door-to-door accordian lessons salesman like the one that convinced my parents it was the best thing for me to do? In the very early 1960s the accordian guy on Lawrence Welk seemed to hold some significant levels of cachet. Accordian can be OK - but all I ever got was "figure out how to play this" - maybe a smidgen of music theory in the 5 years would have made it all make a little more sense. Bela Fleck has a number of albums of contemporary accordian out, and some of it is pretty decent stuff. IIRC, I think one of San Francisco's many claims to fame is that it is the true home of the modern accordian. cheers, Michael

07-06-2003, 06:31 AM	#8
jayh Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 4,606	hehehe I was given some accordian lessons when I was a kid, but my dad upgraded me from the little one to the full size 120 bass and I couldn't hold it, and gave up. Over the years, accordians seemed to be best kept out of sight until I discovered zydeco.... now their starting to show in rock bands j Accordians are not played at nudist colonies, however....

07-06-2003, 05:01 PM	#9
ju'iblex Veteran Member Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Sydney Australia and beyond the realms of Gehenna Posts: 6,035	my best friend is chinese, and as such, had those parents who wanted her to play an instrument. She landed the accordion as well. She's really very good though, can play some wonderful things. And, to boot, she has this brilliant upper body strength which i swear, could kill me if she tried hard enough.

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