thentian

But-but! That's exactly what I wrote, wasn't it? Except for the part just before "whoops"!

Anyhoo, why is it called "The Word of God", exactly? I have yet to meet a xian who claims that Gawd spoke or wrote the bible. They usually just claim it was "inspired"? But what does that mean, then? Surely not the way Heloise inspired Abelard?!? I suspect The Holy Ghost had something to do with it, but I don't recall any of the NT writers making a claim that they were filled with the holy ghost whilst writing whatever they wrote.

Stephen T-B

Off topic and scope perhaps for another thread - if it hasn't already been covered, - but this thread has made me wonder why the original compilers of the NT incorporated different versions of Christ's birth, life and death.
If I were a Christian and attempting to deal with the contradictions in the Resurrection stories, for instance, I'd say that the core of them is the same: Christ is crucified, laid in a tomb and comes back to life.
This core, over the years (and in the manner of Chinese whispers) gave rise to differing versions of the "facts" , each of which won its own devotees. So when it came to selecting what was to be included in the "definitive" account, rather than anatagonise fellow "Christians" whose preferred versions were left out, it' was decided to include all those which told roughly the same story and were in line with the theological doctrines acceptable to the dominant clique.

By ignoring this possibibility, Dr Lazer Blast is a man with a spoon trying to dig a hole through warer.

dr lazer blast

argument from authority.


Fear and joy
ending with fear.

fear, joy, and fear

According to the rules I can create a coherent narrative, using all the scripture, and I am doing just that. So once again you are wrong 2 seperate passages.

Lets go by amaleqs 'logic' and his 'expert opinion' sha'll we
Que up this mans post.
so if we go by your logic.
cool no problems here.
uh oh, we have fear in the form of doubt now, can we have that amelaq?
oh no...now she can't have that joy because..why?
so since there is no more joy because
then when mary got afraid
she lost all of her joy because why amaleq?
so now we have doubt, and according to scripture the doubt followed the joy, thanks 'amigo' now that joy is removed from the equation becuase
looks like according to your logic, mary is free to doubt.
so I guess its analogous.

By your own logic, it seems you agree.

Amaleq13

Yes and, as we've already seen, not the fallacious sort. No need to keep repeating your error.

Yes but not doubt and joy. We only obtain that from your attempted harmonization. None of the individual versions repeat your error. It is entirely of your own creation.

No, we have fear. You have no justification to change the explicitly described fear into doubt. That is the shell game to which I referred earlier. It is the fallacy of equivocation. There is no indication in any version of the story that Mary doubted the message of the angels. That is only found in your attempted harmonization.

thentian

The obvious solution would have been to create a synopsis of the various resurrection stories and purge anything that was blatantly against doctrine. So if one of the gospels had a clearly unsatisfactory ending, you could simply snip it away and replace it with something that agreed better with all the other gospels and the doctrine. Hmm...

Of course, it also helps if most of the populace is illiterate. That way the gospels must be read to them by a properly educated priest. Over time one can close down all academies and other institutions that teach people reading and writing and aren't controlled by the church. No problem then with contradictions in the holy scriptures! With a bit of look, nobody will find out about it for centuries!

angelo

You have to check just in case it's a talking snake. You see, there is a talking snake in the tale about Adam and Steve......er ..Eve.
Imagine having a talking snake? You could make fortune in television appearences alone. Randi would have to pay you the Million dollar challenge as well. That's why the snake is first grabbed by the tail. :Cheeky:

angelo

Excuse me for butting in. But is that just straight methylated spirit or something a bit more appealing like Scotch whisky spirit? I think either one will definitely give you guidance if drank in over indulgence. :Cheeky:

dr lazer blast

the irony!



I was asked to create a haminization, and I am doing so, I am not breaking the rules at all. This is not about how YOU interpret the scripture either, it is about how I am interpreting the scripture, and you are supposed to judge and criticize how I interpret it.

It is not impossible that mary did not believe what the angels said, in fact the new testament is filled with examples of people not believing angels, so I don't know where you get the 'everyone must believe everything angels say' theory from, because that isn't scripture based.

thentian

I think it is useful at this point to post the rules of the challenge again:

"The conditions of the challenge are simple and reasonable. In each of the four Gospels, begin at Easter morning and read to the end of the book: Matthew 28, Mark 16, Luke 24, and John 20-21. Also read Acts 1:3-12 and Paul's tiny version of the story in I Corinthians 15:3-8. These 165 verses can be read in a few moments. Then, without omitting a single detail from these separate accounts, write a simple, chronological narrative of the events between the resurrection and the ascension: what happened first, second, and so on; who said what, when; and where these things happened.

Since the gospels do not always give precise times of day, it is permissible to make educated guesses. The narrative does not have to pretend to present a perfect picture--it only needs to give at least one plausible account of all of the facts. Additional explanation of the narrative may be set apart in parentheses. The important condition to the challenge, however, is that not one single biblical detail be omitted."

dlb, could you please post your narrative again as it is currently? I lost track of it and I think you may have changed it since the previous version anyway?

dr lazer blast

I actually haven't changed it, i've been trying to iron out some of the details, regarding specific questions about it.

This is still my first original narrative

Mary magdelana Mary mother of James, and Salome went to the tomb to anoint Christ with spices. Saw the guards and the rock, asked who is going to move the tomb. Angel comes down starts the earthquake gets off the rock goes into the tomb, after the earthquake they look and see the guards were dead and the rock is moved. They go in the tomb, 2 angels and no remains of Jesus. One of the 2 angels (Mark only said A man because only one of the 2 angels spoke) talked telling them that Jesus had risen from the dead telling them that He was not in the tomb and they should go and tell the disciples and that Jesus will go before them into Galilee after the meeting in Jerusalem. The 3 women separate mary magdelna going to find Peter and the other disciple, and the other 2 women going to get the rest. Mary finds Peter tells peter that she doesn't know where they put Jesus's body, peter and the other disciple run to the tomb, see the empty cloth and linen, go back home. Mary stays at the tomb and cries, sees 2 angels, sees Jesus first, then runs to the disciples house. The other 2 women go to tell the other disciples, meet the 2 men described in Luke, tell the 2 men about the angel, then they leave and Jesus appears to Mary mother of James and Salome. All the women arrive at the house at about roughly the same time, and tell their stories with mary magdelene telling the story of how peter got up and went to the tomb, and the 2 men described in luke come in afterwards (they had seen Jesus a little bit after the women left them).
Jesus then appeared to everyone in that room, then appeared to thomas, thereby showing himself to the 12 and the apostles, He breathed the Holy Ghost on them. The disciples left Jerusalem. Jesus appeared to Cephas, then at the head of 500, to James separately, Jesus then went before them to galilee and waited. The disciples and the apostles arrived at Galilee and saw Jesus there. Jesus talked to them giving them the promise that the Holy Ghost would be upon them soon, Then Jesus ascended to heaven. Then later Jesus appeared to paul.