GenesisNemesis

The Ressurection of Jesus Christ was not a historical event. You see, the ancient people believed that Heaven was in fact a physical place. We just call it the sky. So, the ascension of Jesus Christ in the flesh into Heaven could not have happened either, right? Space flight must be a sin! From this, I think we can all safely say that the Ressurection was indeed not a historical event. Unless, of course, Jesus can breathe in vaccuum.

Which is highly unlikely because vaccuum is mentioned nowhere in the Bible.