Secular Elation

Having been at these boards three years this month*, there have indeed been many threads where members of the board treated each other horribly. Ad hominem, insults, heightened emotions, and the like.

I wonder, would we really treat each other the same way if instead we saw each other in person, face to face, rather than over the internet? I think the inherent anonymity of the internet compels us to more openly engage in less pleasant responses to others than we would if we interacted in the real world. For example, people have said some things in past threads (or rather, I have involved myself in discussions not quite constructive) and I easily responded in a thorny manner. However, I do have many acquaintences in real life that have caused me to react the same way--only I held back, and cordially cooperated with them. They way I socialize and interact with internet acquaintences is far different than acquaintences in real life.

Of course, it's not like in real life we always put on a smile for our company, regardless of what we are thinking and feeling in our heads. But it seems to be that people do not inhibit their emotions on internet boards as with real life.

Looking back on very old threads in the archives, I observed how I acted and reacted to other members in certain threads. I look on them shamefully now, and wonder how I could have been so mean. I never post anything of the sort now, nor recently. It is as if I have changed in a couple of years.

Realizing this, I have since made sure to not let loose with my emotions on these boards.

Pointless post, but an interesting comment.

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*I am shown to have registered on April of 2001, but I originally registered under a different handle back in September 2000.

Roland98

Interesting question. I think many people would be assholes no matter what; some people have no problem treating others like shit, whether it's face-to-face or in cyberspace. I try to treat others pretty nicely anyway, so I doubt I'd change much (although I might tone down some of the sarcasm I occasionally use when dealing with creationists. Maybe...)

elwoodblues

Very interesting topic, and it'll only get more relevant as more and more interaction occurs online.

Even on the phone, it's different. You get voice, tone, inflection. None of that gets communicated on a message board. I can't count how many times I've had sarcasm mis-interpreted. It just doesn't work.

It can be a very dehumanizing interaction. They're not people, they're names. And silly names at that. What kind of a name is August Spies? Damned fool. Not nearly as good a name as elwoodblues, obviously...

It's insidious. But it can be unlearned, when you recognize it. And the people on these kind of boards (mostly) know what happens when the common courtesies get entirely thrown out the window. It's worse than anarchy. It's bitchy, moody, petulant anarchy.

There's lots more to this subject I've been interested in (the stereotypes people fall into so often, the ratio of lurkers to posters), but I haven't the time right now.

christ-on-a-stick

Interesting topic, which I think would be better suited to Miscellaneous Discussions.

COAS
Moderator, The Lounge

Heathen Dawn

Actually I do more thinking in posting here than in discussions in real life. This is a board, not a chat (on the ’Net or in real life); boards are block-mode, while chats are real-time. On a board I have plenty of time to read what I or other people have written; in a chat (again, on Internet or live between flesh and blood), discussion is real-time, there is no time for thinking too much about the response, everything happens so quickly. If I hesitate too much time in answering in a chat, people judge it as a sign of weakness or indecision; on the boards I have at least one day of waiting before someone can nag me to answer. Boards are the antithesis of spontaneity, which makes so much for heated discussions.

At least that’s how it is for me; your mileage may vary.

Secular Elation

Well of course my thought processes are much more involved when participating in threads here, much more than a normal chit chat.

beyelzu

I can be just aggressive in real life as I am here. but in real life, I think that I come accross as being more friendly, becaue I dont take shit personally or get angry. I enjoy heated conversation and am generally friendly, but these traits just dont come across online.

Gurdur

Join the club.
A classic case of understatement.

I know that I would be far ruder to some, I would be far nicer to others, and overall I would make a very different impression (for example, I would come across on the whole as far more funny than I do here).
What I really dislike is the distortion of total communication in a reading form, such as a bulletin board.
Not only are all physical cues absent --- and non-verbal communication is an incredibly important part of communication in total --- but also it is far more difficult to say everything that I want or need to say.
Were these conversations in spoken form, there would be far more information in far shorter a time being passed along.
And with more amusing body language.

That happens to everybody.

Spleen

Well put and seconded, and signed with my stupid ass name.

Sincerely,

Spleen

Zora

I do feel internet communication on boards such as this is somewhat more "rude" than communication in real life. We are basically anonymous. We will probably never meet and interact on a personal level. We don't have the benefit of being known as a basically good person having a bad day...whatever.

I wish we would ask for clarification more often, rather than resorting to hostility or sarcasm right off the bat. An employer of mine used to say, "If somebody misunderstands you, you can't automatically assume they are stupid. Maybe you aren't making yourself clear."

Good advice.