Laci

I also don't know how you can go from believing in a God to not. I think I understood you to say something similar.

I'm a good old Catholic girl. But I PREFER TO BELIEVE IN A GOD. I guess that's the big difference between a Theist and Atheist.

HelenM

I don't remember saying that actually, Laci. It doesn't seem like something I'd say, to be honest.

Helen

excreationist

Well I had been trying for years to be less inhibited. I feared rejection and disapproval and those books caused me to see rejection and disapproval in a different way. So I think initially I think the books were involved but then it would be the "vicious circle" of mania.

I think the revelations is part of the cause of my mania - it made me feel happier when things were falling into place.

Well during the manic episode I was in a cool environment. I lived at university, in a flat with seven other people. The buses took about a minute to walk to and they took me to shopping centres or the centre of the city (which had about a million people). The flat was a few stories high and I had some friends in the storey below me. I've graduated now and live at home in a fairly small town. After I was in hospital, I thought I could just return how I was - but I couldn't think straight (I think I earlier was quite articulate and insightful) and I said some dumb things to my flatmates in an attempt to appear fun. The next day I was in another faraway flat - since they told on me. I had been at my previous flat for a few years. I felt deeply depressed and didn't feel like socializing at all... since I've been in hospital I have often felt quite content with my life. I just can't be bothered to push myself like I did earlier. (Though I went too far...)

Well the books predicted that if I followed their directions I could become happier and even approach constant happiness... I was just saw my happiness (turning into mania) as rational evidence that the books were pretty accurate about what they're talking about. In a similar way, a person might feel happier about the world and see that as confirming predictions that through Jesus the world is a more beautiful place. Of course, the happiness they experience doesn't have to be mania... I think that people can have happiness that isn't quite as extreme - (and perhaps have similar symptoms to mania like reduced sleeping, racing thoughts, etc) My point isn't that a mental illness is involved during changes of beliefs - just that I think emotional feelings can be explained in a materialistic way, without the need for the supernatural or God to explain it.

I guess I was manic but I think I was responsible for it. I don't think it was a coincidence that I started reading those books and took them seriously then within several weeks I started getting happier and happier. I don't think they were mediocre books and I was simply deluded. (e.g. 24 customers at Amazon give the Handbook to Higher Consciousness an average rating of 5 stars)

Yeah... I was breaking social conventions. People are supposed to behave conservatively and not stir the pot too much.

People were only criticizing me when I was breaking social conventions. I think they would have thought my smiling, keen interest in my environment and lack of depression refreshing. That would be normal for some other people. Though a change for me. If I was happy like other people rather than my normal introverted depressed self I don't think that justifies me being put into a hospital.

Starboy

Hi JH and welcome to IIDB!

You might like to read a bit about Cognitive Dissonance.

Cognitive Dissonance Theory

Starboy

wade-w

Most atheists require at least some evidence for a proposition before accepting it. And the more outrageous the proposition, the more evidence we require.

So it doesn't matter what we prefer to believe, if you have any intellectual honesty you have to go wherever the evidence leads you. There are atheists who would prefer to believe in some sort of afterlife; there are even atheists who would prefer to believe in a god. But the facts as we know them do not support these views, and all the wishful thinking in the world isn't going to make it so. Reality is what it is, not what you'd prefer it to be.