Vampyroteuthis

This is a great thread!

Roger Pearse

In fact the very first version was done in Atlantean hieroglyphics, which are really mathematical symbols representing the high state of advancement of people from the planet Krypton. These brought many gifts to earth, including cheesecake. Attempts by early Egyptian monarchs to reproduce this new dessert using sand on a large scale are responsible for what travellers laughably thought were bench-tombs.

Discovering that, whatever they did, they couldn't make cheesecake, especially after kicking out all the Jewish cake-makers, they fell back on building pyramids. Of course some people think that they didn't have any Jewish cake-makers anyway. Hence the old Jewish jeer to the Egyptians, "Let them make cake."

All the best,

Roger Pearse

Tom Sawyer

This interpretation was removed from orthodox theology during the Papal Council of 1217, where ArchBishop Ferdinard Exhalia escaped an assassination attempt because he had a bad reaction to a blueberry cheesecake being served and was in the outhouse instead of his room when the killers came in. It was determined that God intervened in the matter directly through the cheesecake to save the ArchBishop, thus establishing that the cake is a product of divine intervention and not an extraterrestrial manipulation to fatten up their human foodstock by giving us something with a lot of calories that we can't resist.

Your version is now heresy and I would encourage you to have your local townspeople burn you at the stake as quickly as possible to prevent you from spreading the poisonous tale any further. Thank you for your consideration in the matter and I look forward to leaning over the railing in Heaven to gloat over your burning eternally in the Pits of Hell for telling it.

Roger Pearse

Again? Let me tell you, I've had more stakes than you've had hot dinners. (Or do I mean the other way around...?) You can't be a freethinker without at least two ways out of the kitchen.

I'd bribe the mob with cheesecake, except that I want it all for myself. Turn them from a lynch mob to a lunch mob.

Actually I hear that the angels tend to wait for people to do that, sneak up behind them, grab them by the ankles and lift....

Embarassing when you're wearing a nightie and carrying a harp.

All the best,

Roger Pearse

Tom Sawyer

Hmm ... well played, my friend, well played.

mountainman

Seconded! Touche! Peace.

Best wishes to all for 2009



Pete