Ishmael

If this is the wrong forum, please move..

As you know, I have considered myself an atheist. At least I thought that I was an atheist. However, I often struggled with the hypocrisy that I saw in my life due to the difficulties with actually living out atheism. From a detached "intellectual" point of view it's easy to wave your hand and proclaim, "there is no God because there is no proof of his existence." Yet most atheists are really shaking an angry fist in spite of the evidence which they know to exist.

You see, it's easy to claim atheism, but it's difficult to live atheism. I'll explain this later on. But first, I'll explain some things for those who don't know what atheism is about. The word "atheist" literally means, "without God". In other words, the nature of man, his moral standards (or lack thereof) and purpose can be explained outside of the recognition of a creator. Most atheists believe that everything we see in existence is the result of natural, physical processes, which can be observed today.

For example, I believed in the "Big Bang" theory and Darwinian evolution. I believed in the "Big Bang" because I thought that it was a scientific explanation as to our existence, while religion was just full of myth. Through later research I found that the "Big Bang" is not science at all since it is not based on direct observation or testable methods. In contradiction, it is adhered to "religiously" by those who wish to purposely reject the idea of accountability and a moral standard. Some say, "Well God could have initiated the Big Bang." But by the time you get to Ylem (the supposed source of the bang) you've effectively eliminated any worshipable god from the picture (a very convenient trick for those who don't want God but can't disprove him; just make him really small). In turn, I had simply assumed this theory to be fact as my sixth grade teacher had told me it was so. We studied it along with the fact that the earth revolves around the sun, and that's certainly provable and accepted.

Similarly, I believed that my origins were found in evolution. This was superficially pleasing to me as it was an adequate method to explain away actions that I knew were immoral. Deep inside I was convinced that many of my actions were wrong, but evolution helped me to conveniently rationalize those fears. I was able to blame my actions on my "natural instincts". I would lie to my parents to better my own existence, I would hurt others to ease my own life and assert my dominance over rivals (survival of the fittest), and I would sleep with my girlfriend due to my animal instinct to procreate (though had we succeeded we would have had an abortion - logical?).

I had trouble, however, trying to explain the guilt and sickness I had felt when I knew that I had done what was wrong.

Another real problem arose for me when it came to discussing religion. I could calmly discuss the teachings of Mohammed or Buddha, but when it came to Jesus I became very angry. I thought that an atheist should act rationally and never get angry. After all, it was evolutionarily useless to become so mad, unless it preserved my life.

I argued with and harassed Christians without cause. I hated their joy and love for one another. I felt that they simply needed a crutch; they could have their crutch... I was man enough to face my death. But, I found that I was afraid of life. I hated almost everyone, especially myself... but of course, this was "natural".

Yesterday I went to Christianforums.com to argue and set people straight, as I thought. I was convinced that I understood life even though I had never heard the Christian message. I simply believed the hypocrisy I had seen in the headlines, the strict regulations imposed by the Vatican and the hate spread by racists who said that they were Christians (its surprising to note the roots of racism lie in atheism, and are nowhere found in the Bible).

I met people who were nothing like I had imagined. I hung on every word. I was in awe of their wisdom, while still attempting to disagree. At the end of the evening he asked if he could pray for me. I allowed them as I did not believe in prayer, but didn't want to be rude. As they finished I opened my eyes in amazement. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was as if I was a newborn... all my vain arguments and anger passed away. I no longer hated these people. I almost ran out in fear. Last night I prayed for the first time. I asked Jesus to help me if he was able.

Today I called my former best friend (I say former because he had become a Christian months before and after many arguments I decided to have no contact with him). He brought two other men that had been close friends of mine in the past also. They answered all my lingering questions and I understood about God for the first time. Afterwards, they prayed for me. I felt as if I had come into the presence of the Jesus that I had hated so much. I raised my hands to fight, but I felt that his arms were wide open... ready to forgive and help me. I broke down in tears and gave my life over to Jesus. I didn't join a religion or a church... I simply can to realize what happens when an atheist meets Jesus.

MortalWombat

Uh... OK.

I'm not sure why you need our support now that you have your new buddy though.

Whatever floats your boat.

MrFrosty

Moved to SL

Tom Sawyer

First off, the theory of the Big Bang (despite the derogatory origin of the term), is based on extrapolation of direct evidence and testable data. It's adhered to because it's the best fit of the available data and all the information that we currently have available and has proven excellent in it's predictive value towards new information that's become available. The fact that we can use it to purposely reject the idea of accountability and a moral standard is simply an added bonus unrelated to the rationale in accepting it as a fact in the first place. Similar to your definition of the rationale behind accepting the theory of evolution as factual, your definition of the logic behind the Big Bang has nothing to do with anyone's reasons for believing it.

Secondly, has a sales rep made you aware of the offer of a complementary football phone if you continue your subscription to atheism?

jules?

That guilt, sickness thing; it is called having a conscious although even never had a belief system some perfectly harmless activities made me just a little guilty. You sound like a christian that has been rebeling rather than an athiest so I trust you would never dream of pretending all non-believers are just like you and are all itching to find there imaginary man.

good luck with your 'new' life.

Ishmael

If the Big Bang happened, what happened before the big bang? You just can't explain it and your no god theory breaks down and makes us miserable because we're both unacountable to the higher good and confused about why we're here. Can't you see that? Jesus is the answer.

BigJim

Why Jesus? Doesn't a Diestic god make more sense? He started the Big Bang, then walked away?

Do you really see evidence of Jesus (or any other god that still interacts with us) today?

Ishmael

I feel Jesus in my heart. I can see him with my spiritual eyes:
"Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." (John 20:29 - NIV)

Tom Sawyer

We don't know what happened before the Big Bang. Current levels of mathematics break down at 10x-34 seconds after it happened, so any accounts of what occurred previous to that point are theoretical. If you want to employ some tired, old God-of-the-gaps argument and shove Jesus in there because present knowledge has it as a question mark and the causal factors behind lightning and epilepsy have been given a scientific rationale and Jesus has been politely asked to leave those gaps, then that's fine - just don't expect it to be received as a logical conclusion to the fact that we currently don't know.

Also, the Big Bang deals with physics and doesn't answer any more questions of morality than a discussion of whether jam or marmalade is a superior topping for toast does (it's jam, by the way).

If the football phone is insufficient, we can additionally offer you a 10% discount on a Family Pass to an Austin area amusement park if you continue with your support of atheism.

Ishmael

Well we don't know, that's where GOD comes in. Besides, Jesus fullfilled all the prophecies of the OT, that is how we know he was there before the so-called (ridiculous ) "Big Bag."

Ezekiel, Ch. 37 v.24, v.26 - 27
24...they shall all have one shepherd. They shall follow my ordinances and be careful to obey my statutes. [...] 26 I will make a covenant of peace with them; it shall be an everlasting covenant with them; and I will bless them and multiply them, and will set my sanctuary among them for evermore. 27 My dwelling-place shall be with them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.