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Freethought & Rationalism ArchiveThe archives are read only. |
05-09-2004, 10:40 PM
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#1 |
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Top Signs that Jesus was Gay.
Came up with 18 myself:
Online at this link: http://www.after-hourz.net/spoof/gayjesus.html Reprinted here: 1. He told Peter to "get thee behind me". 2. "Make Mary leave us for she is a woman." (GThomas #114) 3. His catch phrase consisted of teaching men how to "become fishers of men." 4. Peter, Andrew, James, John, Levi, Judas, etc, (aka the twelve apostles). 5. The naked young man streaking across the Kidron Valley in Mark 14:51-52. 6. The beloved disciple whom Jesus loves! 7. David and Jonathan! 8. This itinerant Rabbi left his home to travel around with a bunch of men and encouraged other men do the same! 9. Accepted social-behavioral lines are blurred proportionally in regards to how many pyscotropic substances one imbibes. Jesus was called a drunkard and a glutton and when they ran out of wine at the Cana wedding, he made more from water! 10. He massaged his disciples feet. 11. The naked young man in Secret Mark beseeches Jesus to "be with him". 12. Archaeoliogical evidence shows male sperm inside Peter's recently discovered ossuary (bone box). 13. Jesus sucked my dick! 14. In order to heal a man, Jesus gives him a facial and spits in his eye. Saliva is not mentioned. (Mark 8:23). 15. Jesus said that looking at woman sexually was bad. Nothing is mentioned about fantaszing about tight male anuses. 16. Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss. 17. Before the transfiguration, Jesus told his male disciples that they would see a second cumming! 18. Jesus said let the little children come to me. Apparently, his divinely ordained Catholic Priests of the Papacy still continue this ancient practice... to be continued.... Vinnie |
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05-09-2004, 10:51 PM
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#2 |
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Aye caramba...
Vinnie, you rock, but you're going to hell. 
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05-09-2004, 11:02 PM
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#3 | |
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05-09-2004, 11:27 PM
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#4 | |
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Quote:
Ask him what he's going to tell Bush to do next! |
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05-10-2004, 10:01 AM
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#5 | |
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Quote:
"Nothing. That crazy fucker has just been talking to himself this whole time." |
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05-10-2004, 03:34 PM
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#6 |
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Re: #4. I prefer the phrasing "Spent years roaming the desert with but 12 men for companionship."
Anyhoo, great job (as usual), Vinnie!
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05-11-2004, 12:28 AM
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#7 |
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I heard he was nailed at least 3 times by Roman soldiers.
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05-11-2004, 12:39 AM
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05-11-2004, 12:51 AM
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#9 | |
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05-11-2004, 06:37 PM
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#10 | |
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