Freethought & Rationalism Archive

lpetrich · 01-30-2003, 01:05 PM

According to a certain Xenophanes, ~500 BCE:

(11) Homer and Hesiod have ascribed to the gods all things that are a shame and a disgrace among mortals, stealings and adulteries and deceivings of one another. R. P. 99.

(12) Since they have uttered many lawless deeds of the gods, stealings and adulteries and deceivings of one another. R. P. ib.

(14) But mortals deem that the gods are begotten as they are, and have clothes like theirs, and voice and form. R. P. 100.

(15) Yes, and if oxen and horses or lions had hands, and could paint with their hands, and produce works of art as men do, horses would paint the forms of the gods like horses, and oxen like oxen, and make their bodies in the image of their several kinds. R. P. ib.

(16) The Ethiopians make their gods black and snub-nosed; the Thracians say theirs have blue eyes and red hair. R. P. 100 b.

Ensign Steve · 01-30-2003, 01:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Rousseau_CHN
2.) Mary was semitic, but all apparitions point to a blonde, blue eye lady.

Amos is right. In Mexico she is brown-haired and brown-eyed.

Out of curiosity, where was this insightful

post originally, before it got moved here to media & pop?

Jen

Edited to replace annoying elipsis with a comma.

Hayden · 01-30-2003, 01:22 PM

If god had long hair and a goatee
And if his eyes were pretty glazed
If he looked spaced out
Would you buy his story
Would you believe he had an eye infection?

And yeah yeah god looks baked
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Hit the bong like some of us
Drove a tie-dyed microbus
And he subscribes to rolling stone

If god made this place, in the beginning
Did he plant any seeds?
Or did he put them there for Adam and Eve
So they�d be hungry for the apple
That the snake was always offering

And yeah yeah god rolls great
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Do you suppose he had a buzz?
When he made the platypus
When he created earth our home
Does he like pearl jam or the stones?

And do you think he rolls his own
Up there in heaven on the throne
And when the saints go marching home
Maybe he sits and smokes a bowl.

HR

01-30-2003, 03:10 PM

:notworthy :notworthy :notworthy :notworthy

Hayden · 01-30-2003, 03:17 PM

Thanks, but that wasn't mine. I don't know who wrote it, but it's usually credited to Weird Al, even though it's sung by a female. Apparently all satire music is written by Weird Al...

HR

managalar · 01-30-2003, 05:08 PM

Wierd Al RULES!

I don't know if he wrote "What if god smoked cannabis?" but it's still great.

kwigibo · 01-30-2003, 05:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hayden
Thanks, but that wasn't mine. I don't know who wrote it, but it's usually credited to Weird Al, even though it's sung by a female. Apparently all satire music is written by Weird Al...

HR

beat me to it, you bastard

christ-on-a-stick · 01-30-2003, 05:25 PM

Oh Gawd...

My coworkers must think I've finally gone 'round the bend, I was just sitting here laughing so hard at that. I gotta found out who sings it and find it...

Hayden · 01-30-2003, 05:44 PM

Try here:

http://www.robrob8.com/song_parody/g...d_cannabis.htm

HR

Dibble Helix · 01-31-2003, 01:29 AM

Brilliant! My favourite line..

Drove a tie-dyed microbus

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01-30-2003, 01:05 PM	#11
lpetrich Contributor Join Date: Jul 2000 Location: Lebanon, OR, USA Posts: 16,829	According to a certain Xenophanes, ~500 BCE: (11) Homer and Hesiod have ascribed to the gods all things that are a shame and a disgrace among mortals, stealings and adulteries and deceivings of one another. R. P. 99. (12) Since they have uttered many lawless deeds of the gods, stealings and adulteries and deceivings of one another. R. P. ib. (14) But mortals deem that the gods are begotten as they are, and have clothes like theirs, and voice and form. R. P. 100. (15) Yes, and if oxen and horses or lions had hands, and could paint with their hands, and produce works of art as men do, horses would paint the forms of the gods like horses, and oxen like oxen, and make their bodies in the image of their several kinds. R. P. ib. (16) The Ethiopians make their gods black and snub-nosed; the Thracians say theirs have blue eyes and red hair. R. P. 100 b.

01-30-2003, 01:22 PM	#13
Hayden Senior Member Join Date: May 2002 Location: Wellington, New Zealand Posts: 712	If god had long hair and a goatee And if his eyes were pretty glazed If he looked spaced out Would you buy his story Would you believe he had an eye infection? And yeah yeah god looks baked Yeah yeah god smells good Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah What if god smoked cannabis? Hit the bong like some of us Drove a tie-dyed microbus And he subscribes to rolling stone If god made this place, in the beginning Did he plant any seeds? Or did he put them there for Adam and Eve So they�d be hungry for the apple That the snake was always offering And yeah yeah god rolls great Yeah yeah god smells good Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah What if god smoked cannabis? Do you suppose he had a buzz? When he made the platypus When he created earth our home Does he like pearl jam or the stones? And do you think he rolls his own Up there in heaven on the throne And when the saints go marching home Maybe he sits and smokes a bowl. HR

01-30-2003, 03:10 PM	#14
atheist_in_foxhole Guest Posts: n/a	:notworthy :notworthy :notworthy :notworthy

01-30-2003, 03:17 PM	#15
Hayden Senior Member Join Date: May 2002 Location: Wellington, New Zealand Posts: 712	Thanks, but that wasn't mine. I don't know who wrote it, but it's usually credited to Weird Al, even though it's sung by a female. Apparently all satire music is written by Weird Al... HR

01-30-2003, 05:08 PM	#16
managalar Regular Member Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Lincoln, NE, United States Posts: 160	Wierd Al RULES! I don't know if he wrote "What if god smoked cannabis?" but it's still great.

01-30-2003, 05:25 PM	#18
christ-on-a-stick Veteran Member Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Durango, Colorado Posts: 7,116	Oh Gawd... My coworkers must think I've finally gone 'round the bend, I was just sitting here laughing so hard at that. I gotta found out who sings it and find it...

01-30-2003, 05:44 PM	#19
Hayden Senior Member Join Date: May 2002 Location: Wellington, New Zealand Posts: 712	Try here: http://www.robrob8.com/song_parody/g...d_cannabis.htm HR

01-31-2003, 01:29 AM	#20
Dibble Helix Regular Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: UK Posts: 473	Brilliant! My favourite line.. Drove a tie-dyed microbus

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