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Old 05-24-2002, 11:01 AM   #1
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Red face Oh great...christians re-market god to give him greater appeal....

What's next? Jesus' face on beer cans?


~~~~~~~~~~~~
Offbeat News
Friday, May 24, 2002
New Bible Helps Surfers Ride a Wave to Heaven


SYDNEY (Reuters) - Many surfers pray to the god of waves but Christian surfers now have a "Surfers Bible," a combination of New Testament, glossy surf photographs and Christian surfer testimonials [Dude!! God saved me from this really gnarly shark!]

The Bible Society in Australia has printed 10,000 copies of the "Surfers Bible," to go on sale next week for A$8.95 (US$4.94).

The bible, a traditional scripture translation with a color photograph of a barreling wave on the cover, aims to make the bible more attractive to surfers, the society's Siebrand Petrusma said on Friday.

"Its certainly a very different bible from the old black book," Petrusma told Reuters.

With thousands of Christian surfers in Australia, the society believes the first print run will be snapped up faster than a surfer can wax his surfboard.

An earlier surfer-friendly Gospel of Mark sold more than 60,000 copies, 85 percent in Australia. Mainstream publishers in Australia normally print 2-5,000 copies of first run paperbacks.

Surfers have a reputation as a hard partying group, indulging in drugs, sex and alcohol, and living a non-conformist lifestyle chasing waves around the world with the help of their god of surf, Huey.

In its introduction, the "Surfers Bible" explains under the title "Surfing and religion" that surfers are inherently religious , with many seeing their sport as a spiritual activity.

"Many surfers would say they believe in a creator. Some would call him Huey...'Pray for Surf' is yet another surf slogan surfers are all too willing to identify with, such is the religious fervor of surfers for their surfing," it says.

"God's love, God's word and God's blessings are far beyond the best eccy, heaviest head-spinning cone, sweetest scoobie, almighty pissed rage, biggest barrel you've ever had," writes surf photo-journalist Paul Sargeant in the "Surfers Bible."

"Make God first and he will blow your mind on a daily basis -- without a hangover!"

For non-surfers, an "eccy" is the drug Ecstacy, "cone" and "scoobie" are marijuana and "pissed rage" is a drinking binge. A "barrel" is a wave which breaks creating a hollow tube which surfers try to ride inside -- surfing heaven."


Further evidence that overexposure to the sun can lead to fried brain cells! <img src="graemlins/banghead.gif" border="0" alt="[Bang Head]" />
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Old 05-24-2002, 11:07 AM   #2
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I'd buy Jesus Beer. I mean, not to drink it; just so that, twenty years later, I could *SHOW* it to people, so they knew I wasn't making it up.

The rich, foamy, head of the church... Nah.
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Old 05-24-2002, 11:18 AM   #3
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Or better yet, some Jesus Wine -- consider what he was described as doing at the wedding feast at Cana.

Yes, turning water into wine, to the consternation of so many scriptural percussionists.
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Old 05-24-2002, 11:23 AM   #4
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They've been doing this for thousands of years.
It's called "progressive revelation". I'm somewhere
in the OT, there's some text you can take out of
context to show that God loves the surfers. Perhaps
in Psalms?
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Old 05-24-2002, 01:17 PM   #5
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Coming soon, "Buddy Christ" . . .
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Old 05-24-2002, 05:01 PM   #6
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This is why I consider Christianity to be a business. 'Cuz the marketers like to market their Jebus more and more.
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Old 05-24-2002, 06:37 PM   #7
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Talking

The snakeoil salesmen really know how to peddle it. Jesus is the best drug you'll ever take, too bad it causes large amounts of brain damage, especially in the areas that handle logical, coherent thought.
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Old 05-24-2002, 07:47 PM   #8
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My small revenge is that in every hotel I go, I throw the bible and the koran, and Buddha's teachings straight into the garbage can.
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Old 05-25-2002, 06:36 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by seebs:
<strong>
The rich, foamy, head of the church... Nah.</strong>
<img src="graemlins/notworthy.gif" border="0" alt="[Not Worthy]" />
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Old 05-25-2002, 02:06 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by lpetrich:
<strong>Or better yet, some Jesus Wine -- consider what he was described as doing at the wedding feast at Cana.</strong>
Sorry, we've had Christian whine for about 2,000 years now and it seems to be selling even worse now than when it was first marketed...

FOIL
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