FRDB Archives

Freethought & Rationalism Archive

The archives are read only.


Go Back   FRDB Archives > Archives > Religion (Closed) > Biblical Criticism & History
Welcome, Peter Kirby.
You last visited: Yesterday at 03:12 PM

 
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 08-16-2007, 11:56 AM   #1
Banned
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Florida
Posts: 19,796
Default What are your favorite Bible contradictions?

Please limit replies to three contradictions. One, two, or three will do.
Johnny Skeptic is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 01:03 PM   #2
Contributor
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: the fringe of the caribbean
Posts: 18,988
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Skeptic View Post
Please limit replies to three contradictions. One, two, or three will do.
This one is just plain dumb. The soldiers are to tell people that Jesus body is stolen, while Jesus is appearing alive to the disciples.

Matthew 28.12-13, "And when they were assembled with the elders, and had taken counsel, they gave large money unto the soldiers, Saying, Say ye, his disciples came by night, and stole him away while we slept."
aa5874 is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 07:00 PM   #3
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,037
Default

I've always liked Ahaziah's age difference between II Kings 8 and II Chronicles 22. The newer translations correct it, but it's quite entertaining to watch a KJVO'r try to work out how a guy could be two years older than his father is when his father dies. It's also such a simple mistake - just a wrong number written down somewhere along the line, but it is so effective against innerrantists, because they can't even have that.

Another one is the different accounts of what happened to Saul on the road to Damascus (Acts 9 versus Acts 22). What did those with him see and hear?
Gullwind is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 07:16 PM   #4
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: San Juan, Puerto Rico
Posts: 7,984
Default

1. That there are two different versions of the creation of men.

2. That there are two conflicting genealogies of Jesus that both end in Joseph (who wasn't his father).
figuer is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 07:59 PM   #5
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: da Upper Peninsula
Posts: 1,272
Default

I'm particularly fond of the first one I ever found, on my own when I was still a bible-thumper. I was in the midst of reading the four gospels for my theology class when I noticed that one gospel (Matthew 12:30) had Jesus saying "All who are not with me are against me." and then another (Mark 9:40 and later Luke 9:50) had him saying "All who are not against me are with me." That was the very first step on my road to atheism.

Though it is not a contradiction, I am also fond of the story of the rotten underwear found in Jeremiah 13, especially verse 11 wherein god basically calls himself a divine wedgie.
Fr. Gottisttot is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 08:15 PM   #6
Regular Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Portland, Oregon
Posts: 115
Default

Not a particular passage, but all the different times God is described as good and powerful, versus all the passages in which God is a lying, murderous, manipulative, inconsistent SOB and has a problem he can't resolve sufficiently (why did he allow the world to get to such state that it needed to be flooded and start over, for instance? ...and it still doesn't work!).
Jubal_DiGriz is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 08:28 PM   #7
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: US
Posts: 635
Default

For me it's "For God so loved the world that..." he sends tsunamis to wipe out millions of people as a punishment for the US tolerating gays.
username is offline  
Old 08-16-2007, 08:47 PM   #8
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 1,060
Default

I like the two completely different accounts of creation in the first two chapters of the book...good start, that.

The two different ways that Judas died. God must have been really pissed to kill that poor fucker twice, two different ways.

And then there are the different stories surrounder the first Easter Sunday. The most important even of all human history, (if you believe the fundies) and they couldn't get the story straight.

Things that make you go, "mmmmmmmm....."
tjakey is offline  
Old 08-17-2007, 01:59 AM   #9
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Where I go
Posts: 2,168
Default

A quick read through all the verses that use the word "mercy" should do the trick.

http://www.biblegateway.com/keyword/...lewordsonly=no

Can't imagine how hard it used to be to study the Bible before all these online tools.
OneInFundieville is offline  
Old 08-17-2007, 05:42 AM   #10
Talk Freethought Staff
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Heart of the Bible Belt
Posts: 5,807
Default

As a general rule I like numeric contradictions. Numbers don't lie and can't be explained away.

Matthew makes a big deal about 14 + 14 + 14 = Number of generations from Abraham to David, David to Babylonian Captivity, Babylonian Captivity to Jesus. But I Chronicles 3 lists 4 additional "generations" that Matthew ignores in order to come up with his magical 14's. Even Matthew's own list only adds up to 41 generations (14+14+14=42).

Mark 1 says that immediately after he was baptized Jesus went into the wilderness and was tempted by Satan for 40 days. John 1 says that the day after he got baptized (and the dove descended, as detailed also in Mark) Jesus was walking around among them and called his first two disciples, Peter and Andrew). The next day he called Philip and Nathaniel. On the 3rd day he attended a wedding in Cana of Galilee where he turned water into wine.

But I guess my overall favorite contradiction is not numeric at all. It's the silly little lie Jesus told in John 7:8 "I go not up yet unto this feast; for my time is not yet full come". But two verses later it says "But when his brethren were gone up, then went he also up unto the feast, not openly, but as it were in secret."

Black is White. Believe it or perish.
Atheos is offline  
 

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 05:53 AM.

Top

This custom BB emulates vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.